life

<p>Not all families can afford to outsource their household chores. For one confused guy, this created an awkward scenario.</p><p>A <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/e9lsqc/aita_for_helping_my_girlfriends_maid_clean/">boyfriend posted on Reddit</a> looking for guidance after a sticky situation with his girlfriend&#39;s family. The problem: he was uncomfortable when a house cleaner tidied up their home and tried to help. Twice. Even after being asked not to. Her family didn&#39;t take it well.</p><h2>The boyfriend says he&#39;s visiting his girlfriend&#39;s family for the first time and &quot;they&#39;re kind of rich.&quot;</h2><p>&quot;They have a maid who comes and tidies up for a bit every day,&quot; he wrote. &quot;My family isn&#39;t broke, but we&#39;ve never had people working for us, and it made me super uncomfortable.&quot;</p><p>He continued:</p><blockquote> <p>Like, who am I to have someone serving me and cleaning around me while I sit there? I can&rsquo;t imagine if my mom were witnessing that. She&rsquo;d flip.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>So he got up and started to &quot;help her tidy up,&quot; and the parents didn&#39;t react well.</h2><blockquote> <p>She thanked me for the help and told me I really didn&rsquo;t have to worry about it, but I told her it was no trouble (it really wasn&rsquo;t, we were just sitting watching TV.)</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Later that night my girlfriend&rsquo;s parents asked me not to help the maid clean because it was a boundary thing and her work was her work and guests are guests. I told them it made me really uncomfortable to have someone clean around me and they just said not to worry because she&rsquo;s paid well and has been with them a long time.</p> </blockquote><h2>The next day, the cleaning lady came over again to do her job, and he tried to flee the scene, then gave up and started to help again.</h2><blockquote> <p>[I]t made me so uncomfortable I said &ldquo;hey let&rsquo;s go outside&rdquo; to my girlfriend but she was busy on her laptop. So eventually I couldn&rsquo;t help it, I had to jump up and help her out. Her parents walked in and looked pissed and my girlfriend finally clued in and ushered me outside.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>He still doesn&#39;t get why her parents were irked.</h2><blockquote> <p>I&rsquo;m still so confused by the situation. I&rsquo;m not sure if I was in the wrong for helping her clean or if I&rsquo;m in the wrong now for not helping her. My instinct is to help, but when I do people get pissed, so, if you understand the dynamic better than me, please clear this up. Am I the a**hole for helping her clean?</p> </blockquote><p>So to sum it up: he was asked to stop helping both times, by both the cleaning lady and the family employing her. Yet he still doesn&#39;t get what he should&#39;ve done in this situation.</p><h2>The people of Reddit cleared it up for him with a resounding &quot;you&#39;re the a-hole.&quot;</h2><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/e9lsqc/aita_for_helping_my_girlfriends_maid_clean/fajn5eq/">Nonanonaye</a> says it comes down to the fact that he didn&#39;t listen to his girlfriend&#39;s family.</p><blockquote> <p>They asked you to respect their boundaries and you proceeded to disrespect them. Which definitely makes you look not that good in your girlfriend&#39;s parent&#39;s&#39; eyes. For many reasons. You probably (read: very likely) also made the maid feel uncomfortable.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>Plus, the cleaning lady probably genuinely did not want help:</p><blockquote> <p>It&#39;s her job, let her do it. She likely has a system for how she does things and you more than likely disrupted that.</p> </blockquote><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/e9lsqc/aita_for_helping_my_girlfriends_maid_clean/fajmyxc/">Feroc</a> agreed, pointing out that a job is a job and most people don&#39;t want to be disrupted at work:</p><blockquote> <p>At the end it&#39;s the job of the maid to clean, you are interfering with her work. Would you help a guy at McDonalds to put together your burger? Would you help the waitress in a restaurant and bring your dishes back in the kitchen?</p> </blockquote><p>And <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/e9lsqc/aita_for_helping_my_girlfriends_maid_clean/fajngbm/">stolid_agnostic</a> went as far as to say the boyfriend was rude for imposing his values on his girlfriend&#39;s family:</p><blockquote> <p>This is really all on you here. Why should this make you uncomfortable such that you&#39;re willing to make other people uncomfortable like that? You&#39;re literally applying your cultural norms on other people and deciding what is right for them to do in their own lives. This is pure virtue signaling, it disallowing off deviation from your culture. For those reasons, YTA.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>So there you have it. If you&#39;re at someone else&#39;s house this holiday season and someone asks you to stop cleaning, just stop.</h2><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Guy asks it's inappropriate to help maid at rich girlfriend's house clean up after dinner.

Not all families can afford to outsource their household chores. For one confused guy, this created an awkward scenario.A boyfriend posted on Reddit looking for guidance after a sticky situation with his girlfriend&#39;s family. The problem: he was uncomfortable when a house cleaner tidied up their home and tried to help. Twice. Even after being asked not to. Her family didn&#39;t take it well.The boyfriend says he&#39;s visiting his girlfriend&#39;s family for the first time and &quot;they&#39;re kind of rich.&quot;&quot;They have a maid who comes and tidies up for a bit every day,&quot; he wrote. &quot;My family isn&#39;t broke, but we&#39;ve never had people working for us, and it made me super uncomfortable.&quot;He continued: Like, who am I to have someone serving me and cleaning around me while I sit there? I can&rsquo;t imagine if my mom were witnessing that. She&rsquo;d flip. So he got up and started to &quot;help her tidy up,&quot; and the parents didn&#39;t react well. She thanked me for the help and told me I really didn&rsquo;t have to worry about it, but I told her it was no trouble (it really wasn&rsquo;t, we were just sitting watching TV.)  Later that night my girlfriend&rsquo;s parents asked me not to help the maid clean because it was a boundary thing and her work was her work and guests are guests. I told them it made me really uncomfortable to have someone clean around me and they just said not to worry because she&rsquo;s paid well and has been with them a long time. The next day, the cleaning lady came over again to do her job, and he tried to flee the scene, then gave up and started to help again. [I]t made me so uncomfortable I said &ldquo;hey let&rsquo;s go outside&rdquo; to my girlfriend but she was busy on her laptop. So eventually I couldn&rsquo;t help it, I had to jump up and help her out. Her parents walked in and looked pissed and my girlfriend finally clued in and ushered me outside. He still doesn&#39;t get why her parents were irked. I&rsquo;m still so confused by the situation. I&rsquo;m not sure if I was in the wrong for helping her clean or if I&rsquo;m in the wrong now for not helping her. My instinct is to help, but when I do people get pissed, so, if you understand the dynamic better than me, please clear this up. Am I the a**hole for helping her clean? So to sum it up: he was asked to stop helping both times, by both the cleaning lady and the family employing her. Yet he still doesn&#39;t get what he should&#39;ve done in this situation.The people of Reddit cleared it up for him with a resounding &quot;you&#39;re the a-hole.&quot;Nonanonaye says it comes down to the fact that he didn&#39;t listen to his girlfriend&#39;s family. They asked you to respect their boundaries and you proceeded to disrespect them. Which definitely makes you look not that good in your girlfriend&#39;s parent&#39;s&#39; eyes. For many reasons. You probably (read: very likely) also made the maid feel uncomfortable. Plus, the cleaning lady probably genuinely did not want help: It&#39;s her job, let her do it. She likely has a system for how she does things and you more than likely disrupted that. Feroc agreed, pointing out that a job is a job and most people don&#39;t want to be disrupted at work: At the end it&#39;s the job of the maid to clean, you are interfering with her work. Would you help a guy at McDonalds to put together your burger? Would you help the waitress in a restaurant and bring your dishes back in the kitchen? And stolid_agnostic went as far as to say the boyfriend was rude for imposing his values on his girlfriend&#39;s family: This is really all on you here. Why should this make you uncomfortable such that you&#39;re willing to make other people uncomfortable like that? You&#39;re literally applying your cultural norms on other people and deciding what is right for them to do in their own lives. This is pure virtue signaling, it disallowing off deviation from your culture. For those reasons, YTA. So there you have it. If you&#39;re at someone else&#39;s house this holiday season and someone asks you to stop cleaning, just stop.

Not all families can afford to outsource their household chores. For one confused guy, this created an awkward scenario.  A boyfriend posted on Reddit looking for guidance after a sticky situation with his girlfriend&#39;s family. The...