Lifestyle

Woman overhears stranger's crazy confession to his girlfriend, live tweets the whole thing.

Orli Matlow

Here&#39;s what you&#39;re missing when you&#39;re walking around with earphones in all day listening to podcasts about serial killers.Writer Maria Dahvana Headley overheard this bonkers conversation and live-tweeted it for our benefit.Omg. The couple date beside me just took a turn. Her: You never told me you had a child!Him: He&#39;s little. Her: How little?Him: 12.&mdash; Maria Dahvana Headley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 After the big reveal about the secret (love?)child, the long-term couple got into it.  This is an established couple. They&#39;ve been going out a while. He explains that he never told her about his kid because it&#39;s &quot;complicated.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Now he&#39;s explaining about how the mother of his child is crazy. Oh, the look on his girlfriend&#39;s face is stony right now. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017  Did it look a little something like this? giphy  Dude thinks he can casually eat his mussels now, but his girlfriend is not happy. Now he&#39;s explaining that his kid doesn&#39;t need a dad. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   He says his kid will &quot;work it out.&quot; And his girlfriend is like: &quot;how. How did you decide not to mention that you have a child?&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Girlfriend is just shaking her head back and forth and saying nope. &quot;Do you send money&quot; she asks. I know the answer. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017  &quot;Oh god.&quot; giphy  &quot;That would just make it more complicated,&quot; he says. &quot;It would confuse him. I mean, I was 17 when he was born. I&#39;m barely his dad.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Nope, nope, nope. Now it is the song of nope in this bar. He still thinks he can slowly eat his mussels and say they&#39;re tasty. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;Trust me,&quot; he says. &quot;I&#39;m a good guy.&quot; Girlfriend says &quot;Why, then, do you live here and not in California where your son is?&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   They&#39;ve been going out for a year and he just tried to back channel pretend that she just forgot he had a kid. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Because that&#39;s the kind of thing you forget. &quot;Excuses,&quot; she says. &quot;Weak, weak excuses.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Him: Should we get another glass of wine?? This isn&#39;t that big a thing. It&#39;s complicated. Love is complicated. Her: WEAK. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 giphy  And suddenly the soundsystem goes full blast playing a Senegalese happy birthday for someone else. Whole restaurant has a dance break. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 The story keeps going! And it gets......worse.  The whole restaurant had to have a dance break because the soundsystem went on blast for a birthday. Except them. They didn&#39;t dance. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   He just told her that she is &quot;unexpectedly judgmental.&quot; &quot;NOPE,&quot; she said. &quot;Expectedly judgmental. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;Well,&quot; she says. &quot;Before you said that, I was going to tell you that my gay friend offered to marry me for citizenship, but I said no.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;But now I think I can do whatever I want. Maybe I&#39;m married right now and forgot to tell you.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 giphy  He ordered dessert. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I&#39;m gonna send this woman a drink. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;I mean, I was a junior in highschool. It&#39;s like it didn&#39;t happen,&quot; he is telling her. I am ordering her a drink. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Side bar: this guy&#39;s logic is why I regularly run in circles shouting about why the patriarchy is evil. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;It never felt like the right time to have his conversation,&quot; he says. She is just turning him to stone with a straight Medusa gaze. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017  Live feed of the lady. giphy  &quot;I don&#39;t know why you brought this up,&quot; he tells her. &quot;You did,&quot; she says. &quot;You accidentally mentioned your child you&#39;d never mentioned.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   He is now listing the reasons he felt uncomfortable disclosing &quot;intimate&quot; things to her, such as the fact that he has a child he forgot. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;Oh, now you&#39;re listing the reasons it&#39;s not your fault you have a 12 year old you abandoned? Are you? ARE YOU NOW?&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   This dude is 29 years old and he is trying to talk his way out of this using 5 year old tactics. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017    Her: &quot;I don&#39;t judge you for having a child. I judge you for being a liar. As should be obvious. That&#39;s basic.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;I am thinking about a little kid in bed wondering where his dad is, and it turns out I&#39;m looking at his dad. NO.&quot; &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   He just suggested she has PMS. Now maybe I&#39;m going to come for him. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 giphy  Him: The way you&#39;re reacting? I&#39;m just working so hard on myself and I feel like you don&#39;t respect that. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I mean, folks. I have the whole bar in front of me. Alcohol is antiseptic. If I break it over him, it&#39;s cool, right? &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Because this badass woman who is a billion times better than this tool just hugged him. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 Things took a turn when the man managed to gaslight the woman into thinking that she was the wrong one here.  He said some shit that convinced her she is the wrong one. He just explained how hard it is for men to have emotions. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   The last time I got involved in a scenario like this - the guy asked my opinion while his date was in the bathroom - I almost punched a bro. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I still want to kill him. OMG. Now he is showing her pictures of his son snagged from Facebook. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   She&#39;s decided to do this thing. I can only hope that it ends with her dumping him into a little pile of twigs and thorns. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Oh...she has remembered that he mentioned a &quot;nephew or something&quot; and her rage is back. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   The bartender, who is a woman, and I have been discussing this disaster. Both of us threw fists of wrath in the air. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   &quot;He&#39;s not all that,&quot; says bartender. &quot;He&#39;s none of that,&quot; says me. But the heroine of this story has left with him. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Before she went, she said &quot;I&#39;m gonna need more drinks.&quot; Tomorrow, she will tell this to a friend who will say Hell No. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I wrote her a note. I didn&#39;t give it to her. We all have to make mistakes. Maybe she will drop him tomorrow. pic.twitter.com/qz2XMqXyZg &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017    Headley then explained why she took the time to type out this story.  The reason I put this up? I didn&#39;t know how to dump this kind of guy when I was her age either. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   They only needed to imply - as this guy did - that I was too intense and too emotional, and bam, I was second guessing my own mind. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017    This guy was profiting off a long tradition of men convincing women that they are &quot;hysterical&quot; and therefore undesirable. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   She wasn&#39;t in danger. I hope that in the morning she shares her evening with her best friends. None of them will approve. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   The moral of the story: even if you&#39;re a badass woman, it is really hard to resist a culture that insists you have to keep a man. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   This guy never apologized for his lying ways, nor for his bad parenting. He managed to convince her she was at fault for judging him. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I hope that convincing is brief. Their conversation wasn&#39;t finished. It&#39;s not like she is going to forget he had a secret child. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Now I&#39;m home and singing Tomorrow, tomorrow, &amp; imagining this guy being eviscerated into pulp, living, &amp; PAYING SOME DAMN CHILD SUPPORT. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   TL:DR don&#39;t worry, twitter broke the thread, I didn&#39;t get arrested for punching a bro. But I considered it. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 The dude is exactly the type of dude you think he is.  Also, in case that was confusing because we were in a Senegalese restaurant: that was a white dude from NYC doing all that shit. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017    I mean, to me it&#39;s very obvious that this whole thread was a classic action of a guy who was born epic privileged, but clarity. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Also to those who think I was inventing to be writerly: dudes, I&#39;m a writer already &amp; I sell it. I don&#39;t need to imagine bro-fail for free. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   This is what the world too often sounds like if you sit down at a bar, are not wearing headphones, and are next to a date. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I forgot to mention that he didn&#39;t even pay for his own food. He told her he would Venmo her when he &quot;had a minute,&quot; and she paid for both. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   For the record, I thought she was going to shut him down too. I was so bummed when she left with him. He gaslit her &amp; it worked. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I could see exactly how it worked, and damn. Just damn. We need to do better as a world. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I posted this bc I wanted to show this guy&#39;s method in the light. This isn&#39;t unusual. He&#39;s a gaslighter who made himself into the victim. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   I posted this bc I wanted to show this guy&#39;s method in the light. This isn&#39;t unusual. He&#39;s a gaslighter who made himself into the victim. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   The way he convinced her that she was at fault is a classic technique. 1st he says the mother of his child&#39;s crazy. Then implies she is. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   He managed to flip the whole thing around so that his girlfriend second guessed her anger, her betrayal, &amp; her judgment. And she was strong! &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   This is me now, saying that if this behavior happens to you, leave the guy who does it. It&#39;s emotional violence and it will get worse. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Somebody lies to you and then tells you you&#39;re the crazy one, that someone is full of nope, and he&#39;s gotta go. He doesn&#39;t respect you. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   This version happened to be really full on: a 12 year old child he forgot to mention. But all the ways he worked that are typical. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Women of earth, I love you. I want you to be strong against men like this. They do not deserve your empathy, forgiveness, body, &amp; energy. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   It is not your fault if a man lies to you. It is not your fault if you fell for his lines. Don&#39;t try to stay to change him. Move on out. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Also if your guy says something along these lines &amp; you need an outsider to drop a point-by-point NOPE, come to me. I deal in narrative. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017   Sometimes you need someone to look at a thing and say NO, NEVER, WE ARE DONE WITH THIS DUDE. Happy to be of service in this way. &mdash; Maria DahvanaHeadley (@MARIADAHVANA) June 8, 2017 TL;DR A dude has a 12-year-old son who was conceived when he was 17. He now lives in a different state and failed to tell his girlfriend of a year, but that&#39;s her problem, okay? She&#39;s f*cked up for wanting to know!

Here&#39;s what you&#39;re missing when you&#39;re walking around with earphones in all day listening to podcasts about serial killers.  Writer Maria Dahvana Headley overheard this bonkers conversation and live-tweeted it for our benefit. ...