My husband and I (both 30s) purchased a new house together last month. His mom nagged us for a copy of ths key, but I refused because in our old home, she kept letting herself in and invade our privacy.
She begged, cried and even tried to send people at me to pressure me to agree. I still refused but later I found out that my husband gave her a copy. I was livid. I had the biggest argument with him because of it. He said that it was done and that 'there was NOTHING I can do about it'
I cried my eyes out in frustration but then I contacted a locksmith and had the lock changed. My husband found out and went off on me saying I had no right to make such decision on my own, but I replied that he didn't consult me when he decided to let his mom have a copy of the key.
I stated that I will not be living in paranoia in my own house anymore. He yelled at me asking what he should tell his mom now then stormed off.
His dad and family knew and started calling me petty and whatnot. He's refusing to speak to me unless I 'correct' my mistake. AITA for doing this?
Here's what people had to say:
NTA but the best way to correct this mistake isn’t with a locksmith, it’s with a divorce lawyer.
Do it now, before there are children. You can literally walk away from the whole thing and never have to deal with them again.
NTA. She has no reason to have a key. This about her control over her son. He NEEDS to know that her having a key is about her control over HIM and by extension YOU. THIS IS NOT NORMAL BEHAVIOUR FOR NORMAL PEOPLE. Also, undoubtedly he will give her a copy of the new key.
I almost wanna say YTA for marrying a mama’s boy. There’s nothing you can do that’s going to change him.
NTA. Your husband giving the key to his mother against your expressed wishes, telling you there was nothing you could do, then getting mad at you for getting the locks changed without his consent, whew, the nerve. And now he’s giving you the silent treatment.
NTA. Your MIL makes you feel uncomfortable in your own home so it is understandable that you would wish to reinforce boundaries. Husband didn't consider your feelings when he went ahead and gave her a key anyway. So you fixed the issue.