In a situation that recalls a classic episode of Seinfeld, one woman wonders aloud what the principles of moral justice decree in a tense situation within the sky. In an almost Solomonic dilemma, there is only one first class seat booked but two people. He is a business traveler. She is his companion. Who gets it?
The context: a work trip.
My husband's (33m) company recently chose him to attend a conference in Miami. They chose just him and a few of his co-workers out of a ton of candidates so it was quite the honor.
The company told them that they were allowed to bring their spouses/partners but that they wouldn't be springing for plane tickets for us, so if they wanted to bring us they'd have to buy tickets out of their own pockets.
My husband asked me (32f) if I wanted to go and I emphatically told him that I did; I'd never been to Florida in my life and I thought it'd be a fun trip.
The perennial, almost biblical conflict: only one first class ticket.
He told me 'great' but when we went to the website to buy tickets he asked if I'd be OK with flying coach even though he'd be flying first class on the way there--coach on the way home.
I asked him why we couldn't just fly together and he replied 'First class is just so expensive. I feel bad but we just can't afford it, especially if we want to go out and have fun in Miami. The flight is only a few hours.'
Does anyone know what first class on a couple-hour flight is even like? Is it nice? Someone rich — please comment. In any event, the conflict escalated.
This really, really bothered me. I understood that a first class ticket for me would strain our budget a bit but what kind of a man lives it up in first class while his wife sits in coach?
I asked him just that and he responded 'Come on. I'm taking you along on my work trip. I earned my first class seat by working hard. It's my reward.'
But I insisted that if we truly couldn't afford a first class seat for me (we could have; it would have hurt a little but we could have) that he as a gentleman should give up his seat for me. We argued but he ultimately agreed to give me his seat.
Naturally, this all put a stain the size of Jerusalem on the memory of the trip.
We had a good time in Miami but he's been a little mad at me since, saying that he earned his first class seat; that it was free and cost us nothing unlike my plane ticket, and that I should have just let him enjoy what he'd earned instead of 'guilting him out of it.'
I think he's being a baby and that he should have put his wife's comfort above his own, especially since he made the choice to be cheap.
Now you be the marriage ref. Who's right?
We're very close to his parents so we've taken this argument to them for mediation but they are split; his father agrees with me that he wasn't being a gentleman while his mother thinks that he earned his first class seat and that I should have let him have it. So I'll ask all of you; AITA?
Clave0051 spits 'live a little' in OP's face.
YTA. His company comped the first class ticket for him. What kind of wife insists her husband give up the ticket his company paid for on his behalf so she could 'live it up a little'?
Why didn't you just cover the cost difference of first class yourself?
rheajenkins thinks Florida is plenty reward enough.
YTA. What kind of wife puts her comfort above that of her husband’s ? You’re a hypocrite and you cheated him out of something he earned and deserved just for your personal enjoyment. He didn’t have to bring you to Florida. 'Offer a hand, they’ll take an arm'.
KJM158 brings an even broader look at why OP sucks.
YTA - not so much for the seat situation... More so your whole outlook on this venture.
This was his moment, his trip. He wanted to share that with you, but it seems like that in and of itself wasn't good enough for you.