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SIL refuses to let baby 'share name with a hamster,' demands change, dad says no. AITA?

SIL refuses to let baby 'share name with a hamster,' demands change, dad says no. AITA?


Here at Someecards, we love two things: AITA debates and baby name drama. This one has it all, with just a dash of hamster kerfuffle for good measure. Enjoy the story of Amy, below, and let us know: can there only be one?

'AITA for not forcing my son to rename his hamster?'


So to start this off, my son is 11 and has been begging for a “family pet” for a while. I finally gave in when I felt we were ready to take one on, and also when I felt he was ready for the responsibility that comes with one.

I expected a dog or cat, but he really wanted a hamster. So we spent a little over a week prepping, helping him “study” hamster care and dedicated a sizable spot in our living room for necessities and home.

We finally get around to picking one out at the pet shop, he’s set on the name Sonic, but the lady ringing us up mentioned the one he picked out was a girl and that she could get him a boy if he wanted, and he just lit up and said “That’s Amy!” and that was that, we took Amy home. This was in March.

My sister-in-law found out she was pregnant somewhere around that time, and last month they found out they were having a girl. Basically what happened was, they were picking out names and one of the names they narrowed it down to had Amy as the middle name.

I made a joke of something like “Hey, we already have an Amy at our house!” Trying to be funny, but SIL didn’t think it was. I didn’t think much about it at the time, but a couple of days ago she asked to come by to talk.

She started off by saying the joke I made was in bad taste, I apologized for it, and then she suggested I change the name. I told her I didn’t think that would go over well with my son, and then she outright demanded it be changed “whether he likes it or not” because she wasn’t going to have a child share the name with a hamster.

I agreed to talk it over with my son to see what he thought, and of course he didn’t want to, he even thought it was cool that his cousin would share her name with his hamster. I tried convincing him to rename her Sonic even, or some other Sonic character, but he didn’t want that.

I explained how SIL feels about this, and he felt a bit hurt because he thought he upset SIL but he really didn’t want to change the name and didn’t understand why they couldn’t just share it.

I told SIL that my son was set on Amy, and she blew up. I’ll admit I got a bit defensive and reacted poorly, but I essentially told her it wasn’t a huge deal, it’s not like anyone is going to make the connection and by the time her child is old enough to know her name, Amy the Hamster likely won’t be around.

She claimed it was embarrassing because she would always know the connection in her mind, to which I simply told her if it was such a strong reminder of a hamster then maybe it wasn’t a name she should use for her daughter.

My brother has told me that I am being selfish for not forcing my son to pick another name, SIL obviously thinks I’m TA, and my mom has said the whole thing is childish. So AITA?

People went HAM(ster) in the comments — and it's not looking good for human Amy.


The lifespan of a hamster is 2 to 3 years. This problem will solve itself.


Amy is also the MIDDLE name. It’s not like that’s the name the child will be called by regularly.


Seems the name Sonic is available. Suggest she call the baby that


It's hilarious she still wants to name her kid Amy after she already associates it with a hamster. That's going to live in her brain forever if she chooses that name. A few decades from now she'll say her kid's name and will automatically get a mental picture of a hamster.


NTA. I almost went E-S-H for even indulging her and talking to your kid. You gave some legitimacy to her insane request.


ESH. You NEVER put the emotions of an adult on a CHILD. A child is not responsible for any adult’s emotions or crazy whims. Your son should never have even been made aware of this nonsense.

Sure, his aunt might eventually make a comment or something, but then you explain to him that sometimes even adults can act like kids. Instead, you put the decision on him. You put the harmony of the family in his hands. Now, because he doesn’t want to rename his hamster (and what kid would?), he’s going to feel responsible for the fallout.

Please. Go apologize to your son. Tell him his aunt’s ideas and emotions aren’t his fault and that you’ve decided no one is renaming his hamster. Try to fix the damage, because his little head is probably full of guilt that he absolutely doesn’t deserve.


NTA I'd consider changing the hamster's name to Amy the 1st just to annoy her even more.


NTA. The only thing you might have done wrong here was telling your son how SIL feels. He's a kid, she's being ridiculous, and he shouldn't have to shoulder any bad feelings related to her nonsense.


NTA. Amy the Hamster was there before the baby. You and your son are not responsible for how anyone feels about a name. Your SiL needs to grow up if she associates a hamster with her child (laughing here, its so ridiculous)


NTA pregnant people do not own the names they want to name their children. It drives me insane how many parents to be think they have a monopoly on a name. My dog shares a name with my great granddad. I didn't know his name when I chose the name for my dog, my nan (it was her dad) thought it was funny and cute.

I might be petty here but if I was OP I would be posting pictures of Amy the hamster all over my social media, letting the world know that Amy the hamster exists.


Wait til she finds out Amy the Hamster was named after Amy the Hedgehog - and that Amy will be around longer than the hamster!! 🤣 NTA but honestly I wouldn’t even have put it on your son’s shoulders to begin with. It’s not a child’s role to manage the emotions of adults.


Yeah, I can’t believe OP even brought this BS request to their son’s attention. The only proper conversation to have with the son is how to politely tell SIL to take a hike when she inevitably goes around OP’s back and confronts the son directly.

This is a great opportunity for the son to learn about boundaries, adults being stupid, standing up for one’s self, a parent having their back, etc.


Amy the Hamster was here first. I’m tossing up the name Matilda (Tilly for short) for our baby girl. Brother in law's dog is Tilly. No way in hell I’m going to ask him to change the dog’s name. But I’ll be checking with him to make sure he’s ok with us naming our girl after his dog. You SIL has it arse about backwards. NTA

It's hamster versus baby — who ya got?

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