I worked at a restaurant and one time the chef burned the apple sauce that was supposed to be served with the pork chop, he put it on the menu as “smoked applesauce” and people loved it - A$5Ketchum42069
Just because you’re on hold doesn’t mean we can’t hear you. - Spanksy_Banksy
Good audio engineers will have faders/knobs that don't do anything. When the talent asks for a change that's goofy or makes no sense, we'll adjust that phantom knob and watch them nod their head in approval of their amazing idea. - iMixMusicOnTwitch
Dog trainer, this is a hack we want people to understand. One reason we can get your dog to do something so fast is because we use a high rate of reinforcement. Example : I'm training your dog to walk on leash without pulling, and we practice in your driveway. I feed the dog 20 tiny pieces of food by my knee as we walk to the end of the driveway. The first time a client tries the exercise they may use five.
The mechanics of the exercise look easy, but it takes time to get used to. And when people are practicing on their own they do other things, instead of focus on the exercise. They forget how often they need to reinforce the dog for doing the right thing.
If they do the exercise for two minutes during each walk, with a high rate of reinforcement (RoR) , that may be all it takes. And once the dog starts to learn, you can gradually slow down the RoR. - a_real_dog_trainer
I’m a teacher. You can learn ANYTHING you want now from the internet if you have the willpower. Teaching continues to exist because most humans learn best with someone to hold them accountable and human interaction. That said- especially with YouTube, if you have a little patience and aren’t afraid of trial and error, you can literally learn anything.
Edited to add: as many of you pointed out, plenty of room for nuance, and I am speaking very generally. There’s probably a balance to be made between situations where we can use our own intrinsic motivation to learn and the moments we recognize our needs for an experienced person in the subject to motivate us and bounce ideas off of.
I do sometimes feel a bit guilty that I could be learning literally anything I want and I’m… ahem. Scrolling the internet. Guilty guilty, I am the reason for my own job security… I also need the accountability at times. - ConejillodeIndias436
Bartender here. If you're at an event with an open bar or something similar, tip $20 cash on your first drink and introduce yourself to your bartender (if it isn't crazy busy).
Give them the cash and say some variation on: "Hey X, good to meet you, my name's Mike. I'm going to be drinking [your drink order] all night. Thanks for taking care of us at this event." Guarantees good service, skipping the line, etc. - backlikeclap
All of the ghost writing paralegals do for attorneys. I always think how pissed I would be to find out that I was paying for attorney time and getting paralegal time. - APuffyCloudSky
Animal Medicine. Just because you put clothes on your pet doesn’t make him your child. Please don’t spend more money than you can afford. Even if we manage to get your 14 year old dog through cancer, you still have a 14 year old dog. You should not make your pet suffer because you feel sad, Fido isn’t enjoying life let him go. - Substantial-Spinach3
You can do most maintenance on your own car. I’m a professional mechanic and my best resource for information is a quick YouTube search. - Itshammertimebi
I work in IT and can confidently say that providing bribery in terms of food or snack will 100% get your issue taken care of faster and will help you jump the line in the ticket queue. - Big-Routine222
Sometimes teachers do just pull grades out of their a$%. - thesongsinmyhead
Consulting: we don't know either. - 4dham
I used to work in the floral industry. Don't call a large national florist. Look up a local florist in your recipient's area and call them directly. Most have websites to help you choose and you'll save money on delivery and service fees which can go towards a nicer arrangement. Also, unless you order flowers regularly, the membership/loyalty program is a scam and hard to cancel. - abbys_alibi
If you or a teenager you know are admitted to a name brand / expensive / rich college and their financial aid package isn’t enough, write them and ask them for more money. Mention the other schools you were admitted to and that you received strong financial packages from them.
DO NOT mention specific numbers unless it’s a named scholarship — eg “presidential” or “provost." At least five of my students this year got between 10-20k ‘extra’ in scholarship money just by soliciting for it - MobbSleep
Former Movie Theater Manager: As long as you purchase something and don’t cause a fuss, you can see multiple movies and no one cares. It’s only an issue if you cause an issue and we need the concessions.
Also, we all know that you sneak stuff in (most impressive I’ve seen? A full rotisserie chicken and a box of wine snuck into Magic Mike). It’s okay as long as you don’t cause a scene and, again, buy something. Sneak in that candy. Buy the popcorn. -classroomcomedian
I worked in a call center for Disneyland years ago. One of the famous attractions, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, takes riders through the story of Mr. Toad, which involves him getting hit by a train and winding up in h$ll. So when we say "Make sure to check out Mr. Toad's Wild Ride while you're here!", we're telling you to go to h#ll. - blade740
I work in the funeral industry and they don't tell you that $5k casket in the funeral home you can order it for about $900 bucks from the same place and have it shipped to the funeral home. Most do 2 day shipping. Don't order the flowers thru the funeral home.
You can get a Spray (the flower arrangement that sits on top of the casket)for a $100 bucks from Krogers floral department. The funeral home will charge $300 for the same flowers. You don't need a fancy outer burial container. Just get a concrete box. They will try to sell you a sealed vault that protects the casket...you plan on reusing it?? There's no need for that. - Justherelost
Nobody who is a classical musician likes playing weddings. They are the grunt work of music gigs. If you book classical musicians for your wedding I guarantee you will be getting people who threw something together at the last minute and would rather be anywhere else. I tell all my family and friends to just get a DJ. - Savings-Hand-864
Therapist: being rude to the receptionists or the other staff in general makes it REALLY hard to approach you with unconditional positive regard. Also sheds some light on how you function OUTSIDE of the office. - theguyfromtheweb7
Orchestral violinist. Sometimes we don't play all the notes. - reddititaly