Bride wants to kick family out of wedding when they disapprove of a guest's outfit.
When this bride alienates her whole family, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for kicking my whole family out of my wedding over a dress?'
My fiancé Mark has a bff Theo. Theo likes wearing female clothes. He won't wear it to work or anything, but if the host/hostess allows he will wear it to special events. He's also androgenous so he slays the look. He asked if he could wear a dress to my wedding and engagement and I agreed.
He wore a thing (I forgot what its called (I'm an immigrant from a not english speaking country) but its the pants that's attached to a top) to our engagement party and the whole party I noticed that my family was giving him weird looks and outright glaring at him/passing hidden rude comments. They sat me down after and told me that it was weird that Theo was wearing something feminine and asked me if he was going to do the same at my wedding and I told him yeah he's going to.
They asked me f it bothers me and if Mark pressured me into letting him wear the clothes. I tell them no he didn't I let him with my own free will. And then they told me that if Theo is coming they won't come. So I tell them don't come. Now they are mad that I didn't uninvite Theo and won't talk to me. They also insulted Theo calling him slurs which is when I totally uninvited them.
A lot of people are telling me that I'm making a huge mistake uninviting him. My fiance is on my side but he wants me to think about it. Theo says while he appreciates me standing up for him but he doesn't m to lose my family over him. I feel like this is as people say my hill to die on.
I was already expecting it and I am fully prepared to cut them off because I don't like their racist views. This would also have happened if I had made a LGBT friend and introduced them to my family. And in my opinion this would have happened sooner or later. What are your opinions. AITA?
Let's find out.
youasia writes:
You didn’t actually uninvite your parents. You told them that a certain thing was going to happen at your wedding, and if they had a problem with that, then you were ok with them not going to your wedding.
If they don’t show up…well, it’s on them. They can still attend. But the thing that they disapprove of, (the thing that they have no damned business approving or disapproving of in the first place)… that thing will be happening, no matter what. NTA.
crabstory writes:
NTA. Sorry this is happening. Stick to your values. You'll definitely get some 'YTAs' because 'family comes before the friend' but this ain't about that. Its your wedding and they gave you that ultimatum and wanted to control who attends cause it made them feel weird to look at. Insulting you for supporting your friend IS worth the uninvite. Family shouldn't ALWAYS come first. Sometimes family fucking sucks. Good luck, I hope your wedding is beautiful!
midlifecrisis76 writes:
NTA. Theo respectfully asked you and you said yes. End of story. I mean they hate this man wearing a dress so much that they are willing to miss your wedding, that says a lot about the type of people they are, IMO. As far as you losing your family over this, I think this is on them, NOT you. This is their hatred keeping them from you.