Bride livid about SIL's white dress at wedding. SIL says, 'so? you're wearing pants.'
When this bride is angry with her SIL's behavior, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for upstaging my SIL at MY wedding? Bear with me. This situation is complicated.'
So I (25F) recently married my fiance (27M). Our weeding was absolutely beautiful and how I always imagined it except for one issue. My older brother (28M) married his wife (28F) two years ago.
Their wedding was beautiful but my SIL couldn't afford her dream dress because it was too expensive (it was a designer dress) and had to settle for the cheaper option. I on the other hand never wanted a wedding dress, I hate how I feel in dresses and when I was 10 no family member could make me wear one. So instead of a wedding dress I decided to wore a white flared pants with ruffles, similar to the one of ABBAs jumpsuit.
On the top I wore a loose white satin top with golden corset. I also had some golden jewelry (my wedding ring of course, necklace and some hair jewelry that complimented my blonde curly hair). I in no way could afford it normally so I started to put some money away every time I had my paycheck for tailor to make my dream outfit and to buy jewlery.
Now to the main story. When the wedding came I saw that that my SIL was wearing a very VERY pale, almost white, pink dress that looked exactly like the wedding dress she always wanted, just not pure white. She also had jewlery that her grandma gave her (I had no problem with her jewlery). I and my now husband confronted my SIL and my brother about this.
She said that she decided to do the same as me and started to save money for tailor to make the dress she always wanted and my wedding was the perfect time to wear it since I don't care about dresses. My brother agreed with her. Everyone from my family knew that I won't be wearing a wedding dress but in no way I would thing that someone would think it's okay to wear one on MY wedding.
It's true, I don't care about dresses but I still wanted to be the most beautiful woman on this day. My mother joined the conversation. She also agreed with SIL (she never agreed with me not dressing feminine).
SIL started crying that I tried to upstage her with my expensive jewlery since all she has is old one from her grandma (i said nothing about the jewlery) and that I won't let her have her dream day with beautiful outfit she always wanted. And why should I care anyway I'm wearing pants. After all this I started crying too and my husband had to comfort me.
Some of the guests, mostly my friends were on my side but most family members said I was exaggerating. I tried to ignore her for the rest of the wedding but she was still at the back of my head. My mother and brother said I should apologise to SIL. I don't want to do it. I'm still hurt. But maybe I am really in the wrong? Does my feelings not count? Im writing this while going on the honeymoon to Vietman with my husband and trying to ignore all messages from my family. AITA?
Let's find out.
searise7 writes:
I’m confused, your mother thought you (the bride) should apologize to sil (who wore a wedding dress to your wedding) because you wanted to look the best for your wedding? Is your sil unhinged? Who chooses someone else’s wedding day to look their best and wear a special outfit? Obviously the bride wears the best outfit, the best jewelry, and is the center of attention.
What on earth is your sil/brother/mother on?Tell them if sil wanted to have a special day she can host another wedding and be the bride again.
oppositeguide writes:
Your SiL is a massive AH (I would use another word but don't want a ban) and so is everyone supporting her! If she wanted a huge event to show off her tailored wedding outfit that she didn't get to wear to her own wedding then she should've organised one, or waited to their anniversary party like any normal person would've done, not tried to pull that shit at your wedding! NTA. Ignore anyone saying otherwise and do not apologise to your SiL.
iceeyes8 writes:
NTA. I burst out laughing at the title of this. Say what? Remind mom that it's your wedding and not SIL's wedding. It's not SIL's dream day. Tell her also to stop encouraging SIL's self-centered nature. Does your mother not love you? Tell her you will not apologize to her and if she has a problem with it, she can stay away. I feel that your brother is the golden child. Am I right?