'Confessions of a nurse: 'Yes, I've cheated. More than once.''

"Confessions of a nurse..."

I keep hearing rumors and stats saying nurses are the number one profession that cheats. I won’t speak for everyone. But I’m a nurse. And yes — I’ve cheated. More than once.

Part of it was circumstantial. My ex-husband was an unemployed substance abuser, so the bar was already in hell. But part of it is the job itself. Nursing strips the illusion right out of you. You don’t get to pretend life is long or fair or orderly.

I used to work in a large, very posh nursing home with multiple departments. One day I was assigned to hospice, providing 1:1 care for a middle-aged man dying of lung cancer. He had his own private villa. Money. Comfort. And still — a ticking clock.

I’d take him out to the patio so he could smoke cigarette after cigarette and drink rum straight from the bottle. I’d make sure his IVs were running, his observations were stable, and then we’d just sit there. Talking. Silence. Heavy air.

At one point, he looked straight at me and said: “Whatever doubts you’re carrying right now — F it. Do it. Do whatever you need to do to feel alive. Because one day, you’ll wake up and you’ll be me.”

When he fell asleep, I went online and started looking for an Affair Partner. That AP is now my boyfriend of two years. And yes — we’re genuinely happy. That wasn’t some dramatic turning point. It was confirmation of something nursing had already drilled into me.

I’ve had elderly patients grab my hand and tell me not to waste my youth. I’ve zipped body bags. I’ve watched families collapse. I’ve seen how fast everything ends. After enough death, you stop romanticizing sacrifice. You stop tolerating misery for the sake of appearances. You start asking why we stay loyal to lives that make us feel dead.

I’m now in an ethical non-monogamous relationship with my boyfriend. I also have two female APs. They’re both married — and honestly, they’re the easiest affairs I’ve ever had. I’m just “one of the girls.” We don’t work together, we work in different facilities.

One works in the ER. The other is in pediatric ICU — watching children die on a regular basis. If you think that doesn’t change how someone approaches love, intimacy, risk, and honesty, you’re lying to yourself. I’m not speaking for all nurses.

I’m not justifying anything. This is just my experience — shaped by death, proximity, and the constant reminder that time is ruthless. Take it or leave it.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Pink_Platypus_420 said:

Also a nurse. Also a cheater. A lot of the same vibes, unfaithful spouse, new look on life. I watch people die almost every single day I work. Trauma nurse, so iI've seen my share. And nothing drives our impermanence in harder than watching, and listening to the regrets of the dying, or of the ones left standing by their side wishing they'd "done more."

Seeing people in their last moments knowing there is nothing left for them in this world. For all we know we only get to pass through this world once, nobody really knows, but might as well make the best of it. But I'd also argue nurses are some of the raunchiest, overtly sensual beings I know lol The stories!!! Just first do no harm.....hahaha.

IrregardlessForOne said:

Monogamy isn’t for everyone. Do what makes you happy.

ShipHipNo3417 said:

Firefighter here. Can confirm exactly how you feel and the thought process of the why. After you transport people into hospice and see 29 year old people dying of cancer and process all of that, you can't help but think about your own life. Seeing individuals die instantly in car crashes and putting burned bodies into body bags really puts your life into perspective.

Main_Organization76 said:

I wish other people could see life like this and understand this feeling. Life is too short to care about what other people might think if you get divorced, separate, or decide to work things out. Make you happy. Make your life worth living. Congrats to you lovely.

AcesAnd08s said:

Thank you for delving deeper into the real, human insights and motivations behind why many nurses partake in this lifestyle. It really crystallizes the “why” more than just the act. It makes a ton of sense to me. Note to self: I need to start hanging around hospitals more often.

tricky_dicky00 said:

This is moving. I had not considered you points either. It makes a lot of sense for sure.