Couple charges guests $600 per person to attend their wedding...
Couple charges guests $600 per person to attend their wedding...
I have a childhood friend who is getting married in about a year. I am a bridesmaid in this wedding. They chose a venue that is 7 hours away for the state most of us live in, and is a far flight from the rest of the bride and grooms family. This place is not somewhere you can fly either, so everyone must drive or rent cars at the nearest airport which is upwards of 2 hours away.
They decided to rent a big house as opposed to a more traditional venue because big homes are popular where they are getting married. They are asking every family member and member of the wedding party to stay for the whole week leading up to the wedding in the house that will be the venue. A week on its own is a pretty ridiculous ask, considering everyone has obligations.
On top of requesting everyone stays for the week, they are also asking everyone pays for their stay in the house. They are charging couples $1200 for the stay and single people $600, essentially making everyone pay for their venue. In my opinion, the weak ask would not nearly be as bad if it was not a “pay your own way” thing. Also, I am the only bridesmaid who is single, and the bride does not want to give me a plus one.
I understand in most cases not being given a plus one, it happens more often than not at weddings I go to, but I feel like if you’re expecting me to take a week off work and spend all of that money, I should be able to bring someone with me. Especially considering I am not friends with any of the other bridesmaids and they are all partnered.
They also seem to be very offended when people don’t want to stay for the week, as if it is an issue, and fully expect to be making the money back for the wedding by doing this. The groom comes from a wealthy family as well, so it really should not have been an issue for them to front the cost for everyone.
If they did not want to do so, they should have chosen a traditional venue. I find it to be very self important and cheap of them. I’d much rather travel for a few days to a venue than have to pay for someone’s venue.
On top of everything, the bride wanted to have a destination bachelorette in Mexico, and was super upset when some of the bridesmaids said they could not swing it with the expense of the wedding. She is mad she has to “settle” for a closer bachelorette, which everyone is still paying for.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
evenshadow said:
Demanding everyone stay in their designated venue for a week is ridiculous, and expecting you to just hang out by yourself the whole time is inconsiderate. What do they even expect everyone to do there for a whole week? I worry that this time would be spent doing mandatory set up and diy for them too.
MizzyvonMuffling said:
I would decline and step away from being a bridesmaid. This is frankly outrageous. A complete grift.
fanofpolkadotts said:
Honestly, the best action you can take is to not be a part of this. It won't be a fun, exciting time; you will have to follow their rules. You will spend a week being miserable, and you'll be kicking yourself for the time & money you have spent. People like this are not true friends; they are people who use and manipulate others to benefit themselves.
Sea-Duty-1746 said
She sounds like a friend you will never see again after she is married. Save your money, just tell her you will no longer be able to be in her wedding.
AprehensivePotato said:
Making you a bridesmaid, and then rejecting you a plus one…Heck no. Eff that couple.
PrancingPudu said:
This person does not sound like a friend. I would say “I’m so sorry, but I’m not going to be able to get the time off of work or make the financial commitment you are looking for. I hope your wedding day is everything you are wishing for and I’m sorry I can’t be a part of it.”
If she gets mad, just stop replying/engaging. This friendship isn’t worth your energy. Her demands ridiculously selfish and entitled, and having her out of your life won’t be a loss.