When this husband doesn't want to help out, he asks Reddit:
My (30M) very pregnant wife (33F) is having her friend come over today. To get ready, last night i cleaned the kitchen thoroughly and vacuumed the downstairs. During this time she was watching Tv. This morning, i woke up early and took our son downstairs. I fed him, cleaned the dishes, and mopped the downstairs. When my wife came downstairs 30 minutes later, we switched to her watching our son while i got ready to go to the dump.
While i was doing this prep (which is a decent amount), she was facetiming her mom. When i got back from the dump and getting gas, she was still FaceTiming and chatting to her mom on the couch. I ate breakfast and was also feeding my son again when she asked me if i was going to tidy up.
I said no and that she should do it because i feel like i did more than my share while she sat on the couch and talked to her mom both last night and this morning. She got very upset and said they were my things to tidy up (it was mostly DIY and house cleaning items, which does often fall under my domain). We had a massive fight. AITA for not wanting to tidy up? She is 7.5 months pregnant but not bedridden. AITA?
disenchantedhousewife writes:
NTA. He actually does housework. He stated that the night before he thoroughly cleaned the kitchen and vacuumed downstairs. The next morning, he fed his child, did the dishes and mopped the downstairs. Then he got stuff ready to take to the dump. Dump runs are usually pretty hefty hauls. If she's not on bed rest or disabled, then she's capable of doing a few things.
I was still doing all the same things he was doing when I was full term with twins and had a toddler. Things were awkward and done slower and I had to pee every two seconds, but I could still do them. Being knocked up didn't make me incapable of getting off my ass to do things.
Weaponized incompetence is when someone is doing something so completely half assed it needs doing again, needs nagging to do it, or doesn't do it at all and makes excuses why they can't do something as simple as putting a plate in a sink. This guy is taking initiative and doing shit that needs to get done and parenting his child. He asked her to do a few things. Was it shit that he left out, yes. Has he cleaned up after her, more than likely.
everythingowe writes:
Do you want kudos for literally just being a parent? She’s heavily pregnant, she must be exhausted. You may think it isn’t fair, but unfortunately you’ll never get to carry your kid for 9 months and find out if it is. YTA
obidetra writes:
The OP's communication is seriously lacking here. If he has a problem with the division of labor preparing for the arrival of his wife's friend, talk to her about that. Refusing to clean up his stuff with no explanation is like the chores equivalent of the silent treatment.