"I am dating my ex-husband again for money..."
I found out that my husband (still legally married, in process of divorce) was seeing his co worker. I asked for divorce. We have three children together under the age of 5 and I have no possibility to work full time yet. When we discussed selling the house and custody, I broke down completely and had a mental breakdown.
Not only would I not have my children with me, but I would share them with the other woman that I don’t trust. He suggested we get back together, but I refused. But then he paid my bills one day and we started seeing each other again--physically. It happened again, then he suggested I could keep the house and I understood what he meant by that.
With the house in my name, the children were better off staying with me we decided. But he made sure I understood I had to pay for that too. He is not allowed to kiss me and I told him that I felt nothing. That I didn’t want this.
He leaves me enough money that I don’t need to work but I am still working part time not to lose my footing in the job market until all my children are school age and I can work full time.
Most of the time I feel fine but sometimes I want to scream but then I remember that I have my home and my children and I can’t ask for more until I can stand on both feet. This is a confession to the abyss because I can’t exactly seek comfort in my surroundings.
I only ever told my girlfriend and it horrified her with disgust her so much I felt guilty telling her. If this is disgusting then I am sorry, but I needed to talk somewhere.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
North_Mama5147 said:
Three under five is survival. You do what you need to do to keep your kids and have a roof over your head. Better the monster you know than the one you don't, as the saying goes.
mielen_ said:
I think probably more woman than you realize can relate to this. I don’t know what state you live in, but in a divorce you could receive child support, alimony, and the house. He may know this and is just trying to scare you.
Free-Place-3930 said:
You are fine. You are doing what’s best for you and your kids. The most you can ask for in the middle of a crapstorm.
newmewhodis___ said:
Girl, I understand your sacrifice but this isn't going to end well. Find yourself a lawyer.
eyesbetterblknd said:
I don't blame you honestly. Now that I have a child, I would do absolutely anything for us to survive. It's a terrible situation and he is an awful person but for your kids I'm glad the situation isn't worse. I hope you'll be OK.
EvilEyeIvy said:
Just know this is your choice there’s no manipulation involved. You know what it is and you’re playing your part for your kids. If it’s something you absolutely do not want there’s other options but the road isn’t paved in gold.