"Mother-in-law has lost her mind..."
This is not my story, but I am involved and have been given permission by my friend and her husband to post this story in its entirety with REAL NAMES. So, I have known my best friend Kara (30F) and her new husband Mark (32M) since I was 18 (I'm 31). Kara and Mark saved my life once upon a time but that's a story for another day. Kara and Mark got married in May and just got back from their honeymoon in Maldives.
Back story on everyone: Kara: did not come from money but worked her ass off to get where she is. She is the Chief of Medicine at a hospital nearby and makes 6 figures a year. She is also the QUEEN of petty.
Mark: comes from money. His mother is the source of all this drama. He also makes 6 figures a year. He works in finance. Mark has 3 older brothers all are married and none have a relationship with Victoria (MIL) and she has never met the grandkids.
Now, onto the story. Mark proposed to Kara (2023) and our friends' group was ecstatic. Kara and Mark are perfect for each other. Both have money but don't flaunt it. Neither want to have children of their own (they're life but they do love children). Mark proposed with a BEAUTIFUL 4k diamond on Christmas.
Kara started planning almost immediately. They paid for the entire wedding on their own so no one could make any input they didn't like but did openly listen to suggestions. They chose a beautiful location on the other coast.
Kara originally wanted a destination wedding but opted for something local so my daughter and I could attend. She chose me for her MOH and our closest friends Amber and Savannah were her other bridesmaids. My daughter was her flower girl.
Victoria has always disliked Kara. No one knows why because Kara is lovely, until you piss her off, but Kara was always on her best behavior with the family. Mario (Mark's dad) loves her. What I think it is, is that Kara also doesn't want kids and isn't Catholic.
Victoria and Mario are traditional Italian Catholic from the country. Both were born in Italy and still hold the traditional values, but Mario just wants his son to be happy. Kara went to Kleinfeld for wedding dress shopping. One dress for the ceremony (form fitting) and one for the reception (flowy and girly).
I was there via video chat because I couldn't just jump on a plane and go. Everything was great...until enter Victoria. Kara thought that integrating Victoria into dress shopping would help release some of the tension between them. WRONG! Victoria wanted Kara to try on this God-awful turtleneck long sleeve poofy cupcake dress that just...no.
I'm no fashionista but I know Kara and what works on her body. She tried it on to appease Victoria. Kara showed us this (throw up) dress and she looked at me on the camera and raised her brows. I shook my head and said, "You don't want my opinion." Kara said she did, that's why I'm here.
Victoria: She is not here. She's too busy being a single mom living off the government to be a real friend and attend. SILENCE. FROM EVERYONE. Me: TAKE THAT GOD-AWFUL DRESS OFF.
I chose to ignore Victoria's comment, even though I wanted to rip her pinched little head off through the phone. It's not true and I could tell Kara was started to get annoyed. Now, Kara does not stand up for herself in the moment. She will wait, and address it later. Kara tried on a bunch of other dresses, all pretty, but not what she was looking for.
I knew about a dress that Kara had been dreaming about since Mark proposed. What Kara didn't know was that the dress was there. Amber was controlling the phone I was attending on and I told her to give the phone to the attendant. I told the attendant about the dress and confirmed that it was there. I was handed back to Amber and the attendant went on the hunt.
KARA GOT TO TRY ON HER DREAM DRESS!!! Obviously, she loved it and said yes to it for the ceremony.
Victoria: That dress is a little inappropriate, isn't it?
Kara starting to get red.
Victoria: Mark shouldn't be marrying someone who wants to show off their body like a stripper.
Me: ........
Kara: Victoria, STFU!
Silence. You could hear a fly fart.
Kara: Victoria, I invited you to try to help our relationship. This isn't your wedding. This isn't the dress you're going to wear. This isn't about you! I love this dress; I feel amazing in it. Shut up or get out.
Silence.
Victoria calling Mark: You won't believe what...
Mark: Shut up mom. I'm on conference call with Savannah. I heard everything. (Hangs up)
One week later: Kara and I are sitting in her living room going over some things when Victoria just walks in.
Victoria: Oh, you're here.
Me: I am. I was invited. Were you?
Kara is holding onto my arm, so I don't get up and slap the bejesus out of Victoria. I'm known as the guard dog in my friend group. Victoria went upstairs and grabbed a couple things of Mark's and started to walk out but Kara asked what she was doing.
Victoria with a crap-eating grin: I'm taking these in case Mark considers my offer.
Kara and I look confused but let Victoria leave and we call Mark.
Mark: Hey babe, what's going on?
Kara: Your mom just walked in and grabbed some stuff in case you consider her offer.
Mark: I'm not. She's bat-shit crazy.
Me: What was the offer?
Mark: (sigh) If I marry Kara, she's cutting me out of her will.
Kara: (starts crying)
Mark: Baby, I'm not leaving you. She can sit and rotate. I'm leaving work and heading home. We're going away for a weekend to destress.
Mark took Kara to a spa on the other coast (5-star accommodations), and they talked (I don't know all the details) about how to handle Victoria going forward. Fast forward to the wedding.
Kara, myself, bridesmaids, and my daughter are all getting our hair done. The wedding planner (wonderful woman, but scary) came up to tell us there was an issue downstairs. I went to handle it. Kara did not need to deal with this crap.
Victoria was trying to get into the bridal suite to get ready. Not happening. I told her that the mother of the groom didn't get ready with the bride. She huffed but left. Way too easy...now I'm nervous.
One thing I should mention: I have a seizure disorder, but I take medication that prevents me from having them. Victoria knows nothing about my health. We're getting ready to do the procession, everything looks great. Out of the corner of my eye, I see something shiny and white.
I ignore it for a second, but you know, curiosity killed the cat. Victoria is in a wedding dress. A big, poofy, ballgown. Oh hell no. Not today. Not to my best friend. Kara and Mark had security to prevent things like this so Victoria wasn't allowed in. Haha. The ceremony was beautiful and after pictures I go with Kara to get her changed into her reception dress.
I let her know about Victoria and she gives me THE LOOK. The Look is something that we as a friend group have. When we go to the bar, The Look is what they give me when I need to activate guard dog mode. I understand the assignment.
I'm not supposed to drink on my meds, so I don't. So, when I'm walking around with a super colorful, stain inducing, cocktail my friends are looking at me weird. I give them The Look, and they nod.
They understand the assignment too. Kara and Mark are enjoying the night and I make my way to Victoria. People are giving her looks but she's acting obvious to them, and her husband is hiding from her. Good man.
I wave to her and make my way over, to start a conversation. I "had a seizure" and starting convulsing and grabbed onto Victoria on the way down. Drink all over her dress and we go tumbling into the damp and muddy flowerbed. To Victoria, it looked like I was really having a seizure. Amber and Savannah rush over "concerned". Kara and Mark are still unaware of what's happening.
I'm tended to and Amber helps me up. I have a few scrapes from where I landed but I could care less. Victoria has mud on her ass and cocktail on her front. Guess that pretty white dress is ruined. Oh well.
Victoria starts screaming, and now Kara and Mark are aware of what's happening. Mark looks annoyed and Kara is trying not to smile...and failing.
Victoria: Look what this b did to me!
Mark: You shouldn't have worn white. Mina, you know you can't drink with your meds. Are you okay? Do you want to go get checked out?
Kara: Mina, do you need help getting to a chair? Amber, can you help her?
Me: (feigning faint) I could use help thank you. I'm sorry about this. I thought 1 drink would be okay.
Victoria: How dare you? You ruined my dress! You're going to have to pay for that!
Mario: Victoria! Stop. She has a medical condition. Let it go. Take that ridiculous dress off. You aren't the bride and you've caused nothing but problems. I don't know my grandkids because of you. Get your crap together or I'm done.
I "rested" after my episode for a while before rejoining the party. Victoria never came back and the whole scene is on film (video and photo). Kara and I laughed about them the other day. I must say, I thought I was rather convincing.
Fast forward to 3 days ago: Mario is divorcing Victoria and going to NY to see his grandkids. Victoria is still complaining that I ruined her dress. Mark and Kara are happy. Amber is now engaged, and Savannah is still single like me.
I'm happy for all my friends and I have been DYING to share this story. Sorry, this was so long but there's a lot more that I could have shared but due to some personal issues with other friends involved I left it out.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Temporary-City-935 said:
Great story. I was lmao while reading it. My daughter has one friend who's her guard dog nobody can say anything against my daughter around her.
blondeheartedgoddess said:
Brilliant retelling! Everybody understood the assignment all the way through, including Mark on the call during the dress shopping. I wish all of you (save Bictoria, natch) long and happy lives and a continued unbreakable bond of the friend group. Mario deserves happiness, too. What a shrew!
CassandraApollo said:
I would pay to see that video.
Sheriziya said:
THE perfect guard dog action. I am glad, though, you didn't really have a seizure! I had first read your second post and thought you had one for real. This MIL's behavior was really out of this world! Her audacity to do crap like this!
forest_gremlin13 said:
This was the TEA is needed with my tea this morning. Thank you for sharing that glorious story! You are a true hero bestie. Your friend group is so lucky to have you and by the sound of it you did a great job a at planting that seizure.
It’s great to hear MIL got what was coming to her in the end and I hope Mario’s grandkids understand in time. I’d say this was a BIG WIN for you and your friends though! Victoria...jeez, what a mess. I hope she’s embarrassed for the rest of time.
RobinRant said:
Thank the heavens he divorced this woman.
Synarelle said:
Oh, this was just a brilliant twist at the end! We want to see the video/pics! Victoria got exactly what she deserved. Period. Good on you!
LordFawkes1987 said:
Yes Queen! You go girl! So happy for the couple and for Mario for leaving MIL.
FIRST UPDATE:
So, I have been given permission to tell all from the friends who didn't want to be involved in the post. It's too sweet a tea to be omitted. As we all know, Kara and Mark got married. What I didn't put in is that Amber and Savannah also had words with Victoria, but they didn't want their conversations recorded here.
Their minds have changed because Victoria has really lost the plot and began attacking them through text. She's done it to me too, but I'm not worried about it. Amber has informed me and showed me the messages, from Victoria after the wedding:
Victoria: HOW DARE YOU LET THE BITCH RUIN MY DRESS! I ORDERED IT FROM KLEINFELD AND PAID A FORTUNE!
Amber: You mean the wedding dress you wore to a wedding where you were not the bride? I didn't let Mina do anything. She had a seizure. Calm down.
Victoria: SHE OWES ME THE MONEY FOR THE DRESS!!!
Note how she doesn't deny the audacity to wear such a dress.
Amber: Good luck trying to get her to pay for it. She'll fight you first. She's been dying for a reason to punch that pinched face of yours.
Victoria: She wouldn't hit me! Would she?
Amber: If she didn't have a seizure, she would've knocked your ass out like she was in a MMA ring trying to win 1 million.
Victoria stopped messaging her after that. But Amber is right. I just needed the green light to punch that woman. Savannah also told me about her messages with Victoria then I'll share my phone call with her. And the messages sent to Kara and Mark while they were on their honeymoon which were ignored.
Victoria: Hello Savannah. I don't know if my number is saved in your phone like those other awful girls, but this is Victoria. Mina and Amber's attitudes towards me have been awful. If you could please tell Mina she owes me $7800 for my dress, I would appreciate it.
Savannah: That's going to be a hard pass. Mina ain't paying for shit. She had a seizure. Back off.
The number for Victoria has been blocked.
Victoria to me was not nice.
Victoria: You and I need to talk.
Me: ??? Who is this?
Her number is saved in my phone. I just want to have fun.
Victoria: Is this Mina?
Me: This is she, who's this?
Victoria: This is Victoria, Mark's mother. You know, the woman you fell into at the wedding.
Me: Oh, you mean when I had a seizure. I'm so sorry about that. You didn't get hurt did you? I got some scrapes and bruises from it, but my Dr said I'm all good.
Victoria: ...great. Look, you owe me money for that dress.
Me: Do I? Why?
Victoria: (huffing) Yes, you do. I paid $7800 for that dress. I expect to reimbursed.
Me: Where on earth did you pay that much for such a tacky dress?
Victoria: (starting to fume) Kleinfeld.
Me: The wedding dress shop? Was it a wedding dress?
Victoria: ...well...
Me: Because that would be weird. You wearing a wedding dress. You didn't get married. Why would you have bought a wedding dress?
Victoria: I wanted to look perfect for my baby's special day.
Me: And a gown from Saks couldn't do that?
Victoria: (silence)
Me: Because as I'm sure you are well aware, wearing white let alone a full-blown wedding dress to someone else's wedding even if you don't like them, don't deny it. We all know you hate Kara, but no one understands why, is tacky and rude. You're lucky no one "accidentally" spilled something on you.
Victoria: Did...did you?
Me: Oh god no. I had a seizure. That's a serious medical condition. No one can fake a seizure. (hangs up)
Missed call from Victoria x5
I turn off my phone. Kara and Mark got bombarded by calls and texts from Victoria, but all went unanswered.
To Mark: "Are you going to do anything about how I was treated?" "How dare that little b spill her drink on me!" "Why aren't you answering?" "Hello?" "Mark! My baby please respond!"
"Tell your father not to go through with this divorce!" "Mark, please...." "Mark, I need you right now and you're not answering because of that [bad word] you married! She only married you for the money; I'm sure of it!" Missed calls x42
To Kara: "How dare you take my baby." "You [bad word], you better not hurt him." "I hope your plane crashes and my baby survives." "I knew I should've set him up with that good Catholic girl in our hometown." "Answer the phone bitch!" Missed calls x20. She has absolutely lost it. I hope she gets help but I will be here in case Mark or Kara need a buffer for her crazy.
SECOND UPDATE:
Victoria has come to MY house. Banging on my door and screaming. My neighbors called me (they were having a bonfire with friends, but I was too tired after work to join) and asked if everything was okay. I said everything was fine and I would handle it but if it got to be too noisy for them, I wouldn't be upset if they filed a noise complaint or called the police.
I am normally a very nice person. Petty AF but nice. Victoria showing up to my house, scaring my child, and disrupting my life? No. いいえ. Nein. Non. нет. Hapana. (6 languages; all mean no) Do not...DO. NOT. Scare my child. I will ruin you.
Victoria: (pounding on my door) OPEN UP!!! YOU OWE ME!!!!
Me: (silence)
Victoria: (pounding on door and ringing doorbell at the same time while screaming like a stuck pig)
My child: (crying) Mommy....
Victoria: ANSWER THE DOOR! I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!
Me: (contemplates racking a 12g) Honey, go to your room. Mommy needs to deal with something.
I open my door, step outside and shut the door behind me.
Victoria: Aren't you going to invite me in?
Me: You have a better chance of winning the lottery than me inviting you into my home.
Victoria: You stopped responding to my texts and phone calls.
Me: I know. Surprised you didn't get the fucking hint. Look around: all my neighbors are outside trying to figure out if you're a threat or not.
Victoria: (looks around) Everything is fine! You can all go back inside!
My neighbors don't budge, but my next-door neighbor Jamie (fake name) starts recording on her phone.
Victoria: So, can we have a civil conversation?
Me: I can. Can you?
Victoria: (huffs) Of course I can. I'm a lady. I was raised to have civil conversations.
Me: I have yet to see it, but I'd like to see the rare occasion.
Victoria starts screaming again. My daughter comes outside because I've been gone longer than a 5y/o thinks their mother should be gone for. Victoria is still screaming, and she starts flailing her arms around in typical Italian fashion. I don't believe this was intentional, but don't care: her phone flew out of her hand and HIT MY DAUGHTER IN THE FACE.
My daughter's nose was bleeding and as soon as she screamed, I whipped around and forgot about the raging b in my front yard. Jamie got all of it on video and her husband called the cops.
Cops show up, I call Mark and Kara to let them know what happened and they agree that I should press charges. I don't know how this crazy lady got my address but I'm probably in the phone book, but honestly, who looks at those anymore?
Anyway, I'm pressing charges, my daughter's nose is NOT broken, she's traumatized, and I'm writing this in the ER while my daughter is being checked out. I absolutely cannot believe what this lady has put my friend group, her children, her husband, and now my child through. I'm so tapped out that I'm surprised I even had the energy to write this.
THIRD UPDATE:
So here we go. The final update in what some commenters are calling "The Guard Dog Saga." I have had my attorney contact Victoria's attorney. When Victoria came to my house and banging my door and slammed her hand onto my doorbell, she broke it. My doorbell is connected to a security system.
If there is a fault anywhere in the system, the alarm cannot be set. The whole system cost me about 30k. To repair the doorbell, the part is under warranty, I had to pay 5k in labor. So, I had my attorney send her the receipt for that, the ER bill from my daughter's visit, and a letter stating that either she paid, or we go to court over it.
Her attorney responded saying that she would pay for everything minus the cost of her dress from the wedding. ABSOLUTELY NOT! My attorney brought back receipts about my medical condition and how alcohol can affect it. (I did not actually have a seizure). We met for a mediation hearing to avoid court. Both parties brought receipts and witnesses were brought in.
In the end, Victoria had to pay for my doorbell, the ER bill and the dress was left out of the equation. Victoria is not happy and now has a shiny new restraining order to stay away from me, my child, my home and my work. Her family has turned on her and her children resent her.
Now, I want to make this very clear: I did NOT want any of this to happen to her. I'm sure that in her prime she was a very wonderful woman (I hope). I did not want it to get this far. I was only trying to protect my friend on her special day. I hope Victoria can get counseling and can heal whatever needs to be healed.
I may be petty and be a b, however, I do not wish ill on people, and I want people to have good lives. I'm just glad I do not have to deal with this crazy lady anymore. I hope this is the finale you all wanted because it's all I've got. PS: My daughter is doing better.