'My coworker told HR I was being 'exclusive'…for not inviting her to my wedding.'
"My coworker told HR I was being 'exclusive'…for not inviting her to my wedding."
This was honestly one of the weirdest work things I’ve ever dealt with. There’s a woman in my office I’m friendly with, but not close to. We’ve had small talk here and there, nothing deep. No lunches together. No real outside-of-work connection.
She found out I was getting married and asked when the wedding was. Then she straight up asked if she was invited. I kinda laughed and said, “Oh no, it’s really small. Just close friends and family.” I didn’t think anything of it. She got quiet and a little cold after that, but I figured okay, maybe awkward moment, whatever.
Fast forward a few days later, I get a meeting invite from HR. Turns out she filed a complaint saying I was being “exclusive” and “creating a hostile environment by leaving people out.” Because I didn’t invite her. To my wedding. That I’m paying for. That isn’t even work-related.
So I had to sit in this HR meeting and explain that I’m not required to invite coworkers I barely know to my literal wedding. That it’s a personal event. That it has nothing to do with work or who’s in the office. HR honestly looked just as confused as I was. They basically said, “Yep, okay, thanks,” and closed the case.
But now she acts super passive-aggressive toward me. Like side-eyes, little digs when I walk by. Still bringing it up in these weird sarcastic comments like, “Some people are so inclusive these days.” I can’t believe she actually thought HR could… what, make me invite her? Some people really do think they’re the main character.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Klutzy-Contest-1640 said:
That is one of the strangest things I’ve read. Your coworker is odd. Who thinks like that? What’s next? Does she expect you to have her along on the honeymoon?
RestlessDreamer79 said:
This is the type of guest that comes without a gift, eats a lot of food, makes others uncomfortable, takes home a crapload of leftovers and a centerpiece.
Azure_W0lf said:
File a counter claim to HR about her creating a hostile work environment and the passive aggressive comments. That is a workplace issue unlike your wedding.
TheRealJim57 said:
While she was delusional in filing her nonsensical complaint, her comments and attitude toward you are legitimate grounds for you to file a complaint against her--and you definitely need to do so before things get worse.
Reasonable-Wolf-269 said:
Why would an HR department waste anyone's time with this?
ellechi2019 said:
But…HR would of explained to her that it was not a business matter and not called you in for a meeting.
Right_Cucumber5775 said:
And now, YOU go to HR and let them know she's still angry and is creating a hostile work environment. If she would just stop the comments, you'd be fine. HR can put her in her place.