SAHM won't share food with 'lazy' husband. AITA? Husband says she is.
When this wife is fed up with her annoying husband, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for not sharing my food with my husband?'
I (34F) am a stay at home mom and student, and my husband (37M) is the breadwinner. This has been our arrangement as we recently had a baby, previously I also worked as well. I've recently started taking more pride in my home making and in an attempt to help save money and be more of a help to my partner I have started cooking at home and established more of a routine.
I aim to make my husband breakfast and dinner M-F, and weekends are a figure it out yourself deal. I usually wake up first, make breakfast, get baby ready, drop baby to daycare then come home, do class and housework, cook, then get baby. When hubby gets home I've been making sure dinner is ready. I've even made a weekly meal plan. I've started doing this consistently as of 2 weeks ago.
So hubby comes home from a long day eats dinner then winds down and watches some movies. He's a big snacker and he usually finishes his snacks in the same day he buys them. If I want some, he would share but I usually leave him to his snacks or have a nibble at best.
The problem is I buy snacks and cereals that I really enjoy, but by the time I get to them, they are done or half gone. I told hubby that it's not fair that he eats all his stuff and then mine. Last time I went to go eat cereal and it was all gone. When I confront him, he acts like I'm crazy to be upset about food and even bought 4 boxes of cereal to show how petty I am.
Today I toiled from 6am to about 9pm I made dinner plus his favorite dessert (which he complimented but said he would like them without chocolate chips- i made banana bread) I fell asleep and woke up to him watching a movie then he start sighing and says 'I can't have chips I can't have cereal I can't have anything.' Referring to my snacks I asked him not to eat.
I told him what he was doing wasn't nice and he repeated himself but adds 'its okay though.' I blew up and told him that he's ungrateful and that I've put in all this effort for him, and he still has the gall to say he can't have anything?! Like, who have I been cooking and baking for!!
He literally eats every freaking thing I bring. I often don't get to enjoy some of my snacks. I don't mind sharing, but he finishes stuff all the time and doesn't replace it. I should add, however, that his money does buy the grocery. But we're married so it's our money plus I still pay for many things although I don't work.
I feel I might be the idiot for throwing in his face all that I do cause he did sound like he was trying to play it off like a joke but I know he was being a tad passive aggressive or shady at the very least. I came upstairs to our room and I'm just annoyed. I know it's childish but AITA?
Let's find out.
adviking writes:
YTA. buy your husband more snacks! it's his money. buy more cereal! you sound ridiculous. it's ok to have excess cereal around the house! (if there's not a weight / overeating issue).
kalitheblaze writes:
NTA. My husband and I used to have this problem. We came to a solution that has worked very well - I have an area where my snacks go. If it’s in my area, he can only have it if I offer it to him (and then he can have 1 serving, no more). He can buy whatever he wants for himself, and there used to pretty often be stuff for both of us (he’s on a diet so there isn’t now), but if it’s on my shelf, it’s off limits to him.
heartthumper writes:
NTA. I have the same problem with my husband. When I want onion dip and a single bowl of ruffles chips, I have to buy three party sized bags of chips to be able to get a single bowl of chips. My solution is just to buy a ludicrous amount of snacks because I hate the 'Oh, I'm not allowed to eat*'* hyperbolic dramatic tone*.*
Small candies I used to hide in the spice drawer, figuring if he ever cooked for me, he'd see 'em. I also developed a taste for coconut because he hates it and won't touch it. I don't know how to win this fight so I just buy more, lots more. You can try hiding stuff. I never found fighting to work, though.