Woman's fiancé won't cook for her son, says 'you need to discipline him first.'
When this woman is angry at her fiance, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for being mad my fiancé wont cook for my son?'
I (29F) have been with my fiancé (34M) for over a year now and together we have 3 kids. Two from his previous relationship and one from mine. We have been learning how to co parent but it hasn't always been easy.
For context, my fiancé LOVES to cook. It's his passion and he has always done majority of the cooking, especially dinner, ever since our first date. His two kids, (4 and 6) also love majority of the things he makes.
My son(8), however, is a very picky eater. I know its partly my fault for not knowing how to cook and for being a single mom for so many years I just used the easy way out.
Well, when I met my fiancé and saw how bad our diets were (lots of chicken nuggets and ramen) I really wanted to make it better.
However, the changes have not been easy for my son. There has been a lot of complaining and nose turning at the new foods for the last year. And Its not always anything fancy, even spaghetti he refuses to eat. This is where things got frustrating.
Tonight, my fiancé was going to cook enchiladas for dinner and my son, as usual, he didnt want it and asked for nuggets. My fiance basically threw up his hands while prepping dinner and has now said that he will no longer cook for this household because he is tired of his food be snarked and pushed away. He said I have to take control of the situation.
He says I can do what I want for my son and I but he will no longer be disrespected. I am extremely upset and all I see is red. I am icing him out for the time being. Granted, I know he doesn't have to cook for me but I have fallen in love with his food and I feel so frustrated. Am I the AH or is he right?
Let's find out.
billix88 writes:
YTA. Every 8 year old ever wants nothing but chicken nuggets, french fries, mac and cheese, etc. for dinner. Telling them 'no' is part of the whole raising a kid thing.
annalycui writes:
Op, you are damaging your kid and your relationship by not being more firm with your son. Go and talk to your fiancé and straighten things up, ask him to teach you some recipes and try those with your son. Even a simple homemade pizza might be a good starting point. Make him appreciate food!
wheyfacedsaloon writes:
I think soft YTA. No one likes to put in effort and have that effort repeatedly crapped on. Even from a kid it wears on you. It is not your partners issue to fix. I think his comment was out of frustration and not honestly not wanting to cook for you.
I think it is a mix of young children can be picky ah sometimes and also there are lots of changes going on. I can see from your comments that you are genuinely seeking help and wanting to fix this situation.
My advice Sit down and have a family meeting with you, partner and your son. Let each talk about how they are feeling. Ask why he doesn’t want to try new things. What does he like/not like. What do you and partner feel and why is eating better, healthier foods important.