"Woman pretends to be asleep in my plane seat..."
I witnessed a small spat between two people on a flight earlier today regarding their seats which reminded me of this experience I had about ten years ago. I was on a flight to attend an annual convention happening on the other side of the country with two of my senior colleagues.
It was the night before the first day of the event so the entire flight practically consisted of people in the same industry. My colleagues were busy greeting or acknowledging people as we were walking along the airplane aisle to get to our seats. I was a rookie at the time.
At any rate, a woman in early thirties was sitting in my seat. She was wearing oversized sunglasses along with a pair of studio headphones over her head. Moreover, she rested her hands neatly on her lap and had her head tilted back on the headrest as if to suggest that she was asleep and not to be disturbed. Give me a break, half of the plane hadn't finished boarding by this point.
She ignored several of my initial verbal attempts at getting her attention. She ignored half a dozen gentle taps on her shoulder. When she finally "awakened," I tried explaining to her that she was in my seat. But her response was to point at her headphones, then shrugging with both her hands upturned to gesture that she couldn't hear what I was saying.
"You could try taking them off?" Nothing, still playing dumb with no intention to take off her headphones. I think the reader can appreciate that I was starting to impede aisle traffic by this point.
Not giving up, I then showed her my boarding pass, pointing at the printed seat number. She then mouthed "ohhhh" as if she just understood what I've been saying all along. She then tucked in her knees half an inch into the seat and motioned me to pass by her like that.
I had briefly considered whether to give her the crotch or the ass but I chose to insist. When she tucked in her knees again at my another futile attempt at getting her to move to her own seat, I just about had it.
I raised my voice and and said out loud that "I'm not the one getting in, you are!" to which she instantly recoiled and moved to the window seat without a word. The guy who was waiting behind me in the aisle gave me a thumbs up as he passed by. I thought that was that but she was apparently still salty and wanted satisfaction.
After the plane had taken off, she tapped on my shoulder and said she'd be open to switching seats with me "If I wanted." I politely declined albeit with an almost amused look in my face.
Later, I was casually conversing with my colleagues seated across from me in their aisle seats. She tapped on my shoulders again and said that her offer extended to "your friends."
I gave a light chuckle and said "Sure." I knew what she was getting at along with her condescension; that she was "someone in the industry." Too late, I already texted my colleagues after that little incident of ours and both of them had Mariah Carey'd her.
She later circled back on this, whether if I'd asked my colleagues about their seat yet to which I replied in the negative. She asked "If I could please ask them" to which I'd always reply in the positive, "Sure" in a lighthearted manner.
This exact exchange occurred between us not once, not twice, but thrice in the course of a 6 hour flight. To this day, I've never come across her professionally so I'm not sure what exactly she was trying to achieve there.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
anomalous_cowherd said:
After reading the start I imagined that she'd just pretend to be deeply asleep and wouldn't react even to a shoulder shake. At which point I would have got a hostess involved: "help her. she's unresponsive, I don't know if she's having a medical issue or is on drugs"...
ExpertPicture5160 said:
Excellent use of the word “thrice," OP!
anonymousforever said:
I book an aisle seat for reasons, and I ain't trading. You don't like your seat and want mine...only thing that might persuade me is cold, hard, cash, right then, of at least 3 digits.
JessieColt said:
If you tap someone in your seat and they ignore you and try to pretend to be asleep, call out to the crew and tell them you think there is a dead person in your seat.
wowugotit said:
Some people are really awful. I chalk a lot of it up to less real life interaction between people
extrabigcomfycouch said:
Next time if ever needed, let the flight attendants deal with this.
parodytx said:
Nice result, but in today's world, raising your voice on a plane can be enough to set an attendant against you and they can and will get you escorted off the plane. With FULL legal authority to do so. And to involve cops if you resist or argue about it. I've had many attempts of idiots trying to claim my aisle seat.
I do not engage - I make ONE attempt to tell them they are in my seat. If there is ANY pushback its an instant push the call button or motioning the attendant over and firmly stating that the interloper is in the wrong seat and won't move. They always make them move.