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Woman tells brother that he's PATHETIC when he can't handle SAHM tasks. AITA?

Woman tells brother that he's PATHETIC when he can't handle SAHM tasks. AITA?


When this woman shames her brother, she asks Reddit:

'AITA for telling my brother it’s pathetic that he can’t do the basics of what his wife did?'

I love my SIL and brother. They have two kids and my SIL Rachel was a kinda a SAHM. She worked from home part time but also took care of the kids, and all the chores. I was over multiple times and the house was spotless.

Really I thought she was just extra cleaning when she had guests but no. When I had my kid she showed me her schedule. She would be up at 5 for meal prepping for the whole day. Like she never stopped and a lot of her tips helped me with my own home.

Now my brother lost his job and it was decided that Rachel would go back to work full time and he would stay at home. The kids are in kindergarten and first grade, he has this on easy mode.

I’ve been over to help sometimes since he just sucks at it. The house is always a mess, the kids are usually late to school ( he asked me to drive them after the school talked to him). He doesn’t cook it just sad.

He got in a huge argument with his wife since dinner wasn’t done and she had to make it. He was ranting about how it unfair and that he is trying. I told him it’s pathetic he can’t do the basic of what his wife did.

The kids are suppose to be dropped off at 7:30-8, class is at 8:15. He has been getting them there at 8:30 most days. I don’t get it. I’ve been late a few times but the school has to talk to him about it. The bus is an option but you have to wake up earlier for that.

He has 8 hours free and he can’t keep the house clean. I told him she will divorce him if he doesn’t stop being lazy and figure it out. He left after calling me a jerk and my mom is now on me for what I said.

Let's see what readers thought.

cakeeatingrabbit writes:

NTA. She worked part time and did it all. He has no job at all and can't even somewhat cut it. How the F were the kids late?! I mean, one time can always happen, but consitently? I think being a sahp IS hard. But with both kids going to school, he should have the time to do the most of it.

drynor writes:

YTA. The dude is clearly trying to balance things that never had to do before. That may be his fault but at least he is trying. Shaming him despite that is a strike under the belt and frankly not supportive at all.

You have to remember that kot everyone is as good as you at certain stuff and that just because the house isn't in the state it was before, it doesn't mean that it's actually a mess. Something lots of people that are anal about the cleaning chores is that not everyone requires the very last nook and cranny to be spotless in order to consider a house clean.

Nevertheless, idlf you think that she might divorce him over that she might as well. It's a stupid enough reason that it doesn't matter.

babycake2004 writes:

NTA. I was prepared to call you an AH because waking up at 5 am to keep everything sorted is absolutely insane. But that's not what she's asking for, she's asking for him to cook dinner, get the kids to school, and keep the house semi clean.

Then to go and complain to you about it shows no self awareness. He needs to figure this out. These are the basics of being a parent and being an adult. You maybe could have said it nicer, but at worst it was a justified AH move.

So, IS OP TA? What do YOU think?

Sources: Reddit
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