I’ve worked for the same restaurant chain since I was legally allowed to work at 16. At first it was just a part time job to make money while in high school. At 18 I ended up transferring to a location a few hours away where I was going to college and got promoted to supervisor.
After a semester I ended up dropping out of school due to the affects it was having on my mental health. I’ve never been very motivated by money, just want to pay my bills and have a simple life with good friends and family near by.
So I decided to stick with this company and continue to work my way up until I could manage my own location. Ever since I dropped out of college though my dad took every opportunity to try and persuade me to do “something more serious” with my life.
He’s always been very motivated by money so it’s hard for him to understand why I don’t feel the same way. Which I could understand to some extent but after two years of every single conversation with my dad ending in an argument over my career choice it had heavily impacted our relationship.
It’s very demeaning being constantly reminded that you’re “wasting your life” or “not being responsible” even though I was in my own apartment with my own car at just 18 yrs old. We didn’t have a healthy relationship to begin with so this added disagreement just made me even more resentful.
So, one day I finally had the opportunity to move out of state where a lot of my extended family lived, along with being promoted to assistant manager at this new location. When I told my dad this he begged me to look for another job. He said he was embarrassed by my profession and wished he could post about my accomplishments like my siblings.
He ended up offering me $2000 if I found a job that would pay me $14 an hour or more. Generous, yes, but I’d rather have a dad who supports me or at least doesn’t belittle me, you know? Anyway, I texted the manager I had been in contact with about my transfer to ask if we could discuss my pay.
I convinced her to increase the offer from $13.75 to $14.25. I told my dad I had gotten an offer for more than $14 and asked for the $2000 as it was time for me to put down my deposit/first month's rent for my new aparement. He said he would eventually, but that technically, he never clarified when he had to pay me.
He had plentyyy of money but was always stingy with it. I told him I’d just ask my grandma for a loan since he wasn’t following through and then I’d use his money to pay her back “eventually”. Of course he didn’t want our family to know he was being an a** so he sent me the money.
Afterward, he asked me about my new job to which I said, “I’m not getting a new job I’m just getting a raise”. I could hear the steam coming out his ears over the phone.
He started yelling and demanding I send back the money but I told him “well you’re right you never clarified when you’d have to pay up but you also never clarified that the wage I needed had to come from a different job”. I hung up and I kept the money. We didn’t talk for a while and still hardly talk now.
Nice. Kudos on the petty revenge.
I'm sorry your dad's a jerk. He should've been proud of you for pulling that off on him.
My main takeaway is that pay is way too low... having to ask to get over 14/hr, as an assistant manager?! That's a sorry state...
ETA but kudos to OP, well done!
The Dad isn’t wrong.
What if... you're dad felt like you were an unaccomplished loser who never reached the levels of success as your siblings and let you know on a regular basis what a disappointment and embarrassment you were? Would he be wrong then?
What if he chose to end the relationship over your career choice? OP sounds like an adult who can take care of themself and that's all that he should be concerned with.
He said he was embarrassed by my profession and wished he could post about my accomplishments like my siblings.<<
what an infantile little man
This right here. 'Please accomplish more so I can brag about it and make myself look good.'
Screw that! If OP is happy with what they're doing, and is making enough to live the life they want, that's totally awesome and, as a father, something that would make me eternally proud of my child.
Edit: a lot of you seem very concerned about the wage which I understand as I didn’t clarify when or where this took place. This was about 8 yrs ago and for the area $14.25 for asst manager was a decent wage. Not great but paid my bills and allowed me to save as well.
As far as my current profession, I took a temporary leave of absence to help my mom care for my step dad who’s currently in physical rehabilitation. I’ll be returning to work in October and don’t worry I am manager now and make about twice as much as I did as asst 8 yrs ago.
Might not feel like success to others but my bills are paid, I have a good savings account, and I’ve met some of my best friends at this job so I am happy.
Lastly, no, I do not regret taking his money and damaging our relationship as it was already beyond recovery for me. I appreciate everyone’s input and opinions though! Well those of you who were nice lol.