Dad lets kids 'defend themselves' against his brother's stepkids; injuries result. AITA?
When this man gives his adolescent kids permission to defend themeselves against his brother's stepkids, he aks Reddit:
"AITA for giving my children permission to defend themselves and ruining my brother's visit?"
My brother has two stepkids (10,8) that are absolute brats. He is infatuated with their mother though so he will not discipline them. It's fine because we do not see them much.
Over the holidays he came over with his family and the kids were horrible. My daughter 11, and my son 10, wanted nothing to do with them. I gave them permission to go to their rooms and lock the doors to keep the peace.
My brother and his wife starter b&ching because my kids were being bad hosts. I said that I wasn't going to make my children unhappy to appease his.
Eventually my kids did come out to try and play together again. His kids stated pushing my son around. He told them to stop but they wouldn't. My daughter told them to stop bugging her brother but they wouldn't.
They came to us and told us what was going on. My brother called them tattle tales and told them to just go play and deal with it themselves. I asked him if that's what he really wanted. He said yes let kids be kids.
I took him to my daughter's room and pointed out that she had multiple belts and trophies from martial arts. Then I showed him my son's room, same thing.
Then I went back to the living room and told my kids, in front of him and his wife that they had my permission to defend themselves. He immediately called his kids over and told them to behave. Their mom was not pleased. She said that her kids were just having fun. I said that my kids idea of fun was probably a little more violent than hers.
Long story short they behaved for about ten minutes and then they decided to test my kids.
One black eye and an arm bar later his kids are sitting on the couch while my brother and his wife yell at me for raising brutes. For the record each of his kids, although younger, are bigger than my daughter. And they had had multiple warnings to play nice.
So currently there is a huge family fight because I let my kids beat up his innocent angels. But all know why that had to happen. Unfortunately for him most of the people that have met his kids are asking what they did to provoke mine.
My mom says that I should not have told my kids to defend themselves. I told her that she was welcome to host any and all gatherings that involved those brats. Last time they were there they destroyed a stuffed animal that had the cremains of her last dog. She doesn't like having them in her house either. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
gingerdaisy3 writes:
"My children will not be bullied and tormented in their own home. If you can't manage your childrens behavior, then my children will. After all.. kids will be kids, right?" NTA.
straysmom writes:
NTA. And good for your kids who kicked some brat ass :D Those little heathens fucked around & found out. And it wasn't pretty. Let somebody else host gatherings where your brother & step kids are welcome. If they are ever welcome anywhere. You don't have to have him, his wife & the heathens in your house.
I'm laughing the most at Unfortunately for him most of the people that have met his kids are asking what they did to provoke mine. Guess he thought everybody would automatically jump to his & their defense :) It just shows how entitled he is.
allesis1701 writes:
NTA. Your brother's step kids sound like ready-made candidates for delinquency. Though I'd say your first mistake was allowing them to come to your home in the 1st place.
And while the command to your kids to defend themselves was just from a moral standpoint, what if they hurt those brats seriously and charges were filed (since they had martial arts training)?
For the future, just put distance between your family and this dysfunctional family unless they start actually parenting & controlling their kids (might be too late by the sounds of it).