When this father is upset with his wife and daughter over a bathroom débâcle, he asks Reddit:
I know this probably sounds silly but I've been having fights about this with my wife for over a week and I don't feel like I'm in the wrong hence why I decided to make this post.
So me, my wife and our daughter live in a house that has three bathrooms. Our bedroom has an ensuite bathroom, my daughters room also has one and there's one downstairs.
Just over a week ago we started renovating my daughters bedroom and bathroom, she's been staying in the guest room upstairs. But for some reason my wife told our daughter that she could use our bathroom when she's getting ready in the morning.
I disagreed with this because I get ready at the same time as she does (I'm getting ready for work while she's getting ready for school) and I also need the bathroom.
Despite daily flights I didn't back down and I'm still getting ready in my own bathroom but my daughter also refuses to use the downstairs one and she's been using ours at the same time.
My wife keeps calling me a man child and immature and she claims I should just go downstairs every morning but I don't feel like I'm in the wrong. So AITA here?
Honestly, I feel sorry for the whole family, the mindset all of you have, 3 people in a 3 bathroom house, don't take this the wrong way, but I would be embarrassed to post something like this.
This shouldn't even be a who is right or wrong, focus on the fact your wife is fighting you for something this trivial, and your daughter seems to show she has no reverence nor respect for you, even if the mom says she can, the fact you say no should be law... yet you do not like that but she still uses that one anyway.
The family seems to be ruled by personal ego. I'd be praising God we have options, but you guys are fighting because no one wants to use the downstairs bathroom... Too far, too much effort. I do not think YTA, but you all have issues.
NTA As others have already stated: you are renovating her bathroom according to her wishes - she can use the downstairs bathroom.
But may I just add something about the indecency of it all: when I was a kid we only had one bathroom (and an additional separate toilet). In the morning, three kids (FFM) and a father had to get ready for school and work at around the same time (my mum worked shifts and was either gone already or could shower later).
It was totally normal for us to see each other getting ready (even naked, getting into the shower, getting dressed etc), and it didn’t damage us, because no one stared (we learnt not to stare), no one made any comments, everyone took care of their own stuff.
NTA. There’s not an issue with you and your daughter navigating getting ready using one bathroom. Lots of families not living that ensuite life navigate this and it’s fine.
But if you have a second perfectly usable bathroom, it makes complete sense to me that the child who is using it temporarily would be the one to do the stairs. Unless there’s some reason why she can’t use that bathroom that your wife is considering that you didn’t include, this seems like a silly situation.