SAHM asks single sister to give deceased dog's stroller to baby, sister is shocked.
When this woman is concerned with her sister's behavior, she asks Reddit:
'AITA for asking my sister to donate her dog's jogging stroller to my kids instead of an animal shelter?'
My (26f) sister Sasha (31f) and I are very different people. We aren't BFFs but we love each other. Sasha doesn't have any kids and I have 3 (6f, 2.5m, 1.5m).
Sasha got a dog after graduating college. Right off the bat, she treated it more like a human than a dog. She took it on road trips, just the two of them. Once she even dressed it up for Halloween and took it trick or treating alongside my kids. I worried she was replacing real human interaction with a dog.
She also did some search and rescue with it which maybe gave her a stronger than usual attachment to this dog. A year ago, Sasha bought a jogging stroller so the dog could still go on walks with her. It was old by this time and had arthritis. Now let me clarify, this was not some cheap bargain basement stroller, this thing was quality.
I looked it up online and it cost $400! Seemed an insane amount to spend on an accessory for a dog but she was all excited, so I kept my mouth shut. I also noticed it was advertised as for pets or kids.
I'd dreaded the day this dog died because of how over attached Sasha was. Well two days ago it happened and sure enough she was devastated. I felt terrible for her. But I'll admit, I also started thinking about that jogging stroller which would now sit around gathering dust.
I've been struggling to lose the baby weight from my youngest and I could just see myself jogging with the two youngest in the stroller and big sis biking alongside.
And this stroller is way nicer than anything hubby and I could afford at the moment. I'm a SAHM with three kids. Hubster is an amazing dad but he's struggling to find his professional calling, so we aren't in nearly as strong a financial position right now as Sasha, who has no kids and a good job.
Sasha has always been generous to her niece and nephews so I thought maybe now that she doesn't need it anymore, she might want to loan or even give them the stroller.
I called yesterday and first said how sorry I was about her dog. Then I asked what she was going to do with the stroller. She said she was thinking about donating it to an animal shelter that specializes in disabled dogs.
I then said basically everything I said in the last paragraph and asked if she would donate it to my kids instead. There was a long pause, so I thought she was considering. But then she went off on me and called me some hurtful things like a b-word and an evil vulture, then hung up on me.
Here's why I think I may be the AH. In hindsight, 'since you don't need it anymore' was poor phrasing and may have made me sound insensitive to her loss. Also, I probably should have given her more time to grieve before asking.
I've never had a dog so I'll admit I can't truly understand what Sasha's going through. But from my POV, I had my kids' best interests at heart. I don't think I'm the AH for asking the question. But am I the AH for when and how I asked or did Sasha overreact out of grief?
Let's find out.
fearlespeech writes:
YTA. You have as much tact as some of my family members who asked about money at my aunts funeral last year. You can easily find jogging strollers second hand through mommy groups on Facebook or Facebook marketplace.
fixinurshie writes:
YTA. You spend like three paragraphs being rude and judgmental about your sister and her choices.
You called her while you knew she was grieving her loss to offer fake sympathy and then threw in your own sob story to try and guilt her into giving you what you wanted - the real reason you called to offer your condolences in the first place. “Vulture” is on point to describe your behaviour.
On top of that you’ve repeatedly tried to justify your hurtful inconsiderateness in this post by crying about being a SAHM with little money and three kids. Well no one forced a lifestyle you couldn’t afford on you.
That’s your choice. It has nothing to do with your inappropriate, thoughtless behaviour nor does it mean your sister should opt to help you over a charity she deems worthy of her attention.