Man refuses to invite son's new partner to second wedding. AITA?
When this father doesn't want to invite his son's partner to his wedding, he asks Reddit:
"AITA for not inviting my son's partner to my wedding ?"
I (49M) am getting remarried to my fiancee (41F) in a month and the wedding preparations have gone well except for one issue. My fiancee's family is mostly conservative and thus not very supportive of same sex relationships and my fiancee's siblings plan to bring their children at our wedding and they obviously...
wouldn't want their kids to witness a gay couple at our wedding so then they'd need to explain the situation to them, so we decided to disinvite my son's (21M) partner (in his 20sM) from our wedding so we could avoid such issues.
I definitely wouldn't call my son's partner my future stepson at this point. They've barely been together as it is.
I thought my son would be mature about it and understand our side, but instead he kicked up a huge fuss about it, saying that I'm acting homophobic and embarrassed by him and that if his boyfriend can't attend the wedding then he won't either.
I can't just disinvite almost my entire fiancee's family from our wedding for the sake of one person, she'd obviously never agree to that either. This was the easiest solution
I feel like he's being really unreasonable, especially cause him and his boyfriend haven't even been together for that long, so it's not like he's really entitled to be invited at any family events yet and my fiancee does take my side...
however my son is vehement that I'm an asshole and even got his mom to essentially gang up on me about this issue. AITA ?
Let's see what readers thought.
pleasantbread7 writes:
YTA...You seriously expect your son to attend an event where he is clearly not wanted? You're homophobic, plain and simple. You've probably lost your son and rightfully so. You didn't stand up for him against your future wife's shit family, don't come back here in a year and ask why your son doesn't speak to you.
owlscardinals writes:
YTA. Why in the world would you disinclude your CHILDREN to appease members of your fiancee's extended family? Especially when her family are homophobic, bigoted, closed minded, and if they caused a fuss, would be extremely rude and inappropriate?
I feel sad for your son that you aren't the type of parent who would staunchly defend him and tell your fiancee's family to suck it up or get out.
Minimally, you could forewarn the conservative members that your son and his partner will be present and that if they will have any problems with that at all, they should sit out the event, and make it clear that if they cause a fuss they will be kicked out. That's the answer here.
bandonhammer writes:
YTA. Your son may eventually forgive you for this, if you relent now. But he will never, ever forget. People show us who they really are by their actions when our existence becomes inconvenient.