Man tells SAHM wife, 'just take my money for son's candy sale' she says, 'bad parenting!' AITA?
When this dad is annoyed that his wife won't just take his money, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for telling my wife to either take my money or she can be responsible for fundraising?"
My kid has to sell chocolate covered almonds as a fundraiser at school. I would rather just give them the amount he is going to raise but that isn't allowed. So I told my wife to just pay for two boxes out of my petty cash I keep on my office. I will take the almonds to work and give them out to my guys for free.
My wife says that I'm missing the point of parenting and that I should take my son out to sell the almonds. I think that is ridiculous. I think I have better ways to spend several hours than to harass my neighbors trying to get them to buy chocolate.
I told her she could either go out and sell the chocolate herself or she could take my money.
Now she thinks I'm an asshole because I don't value her free time. She is a stay at home mom right now. When our youngest is two she will be going back to work. I work 60 hours a week not including the commute. Now she wants me to spend hours out selling chocolate. No thanks. My free time is valuable too. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
dozenbits writes:
NTA these 'fundraisers' are complette BS. They combine child labor with the pressure to 'donate'.
When I was in school, we did a 'fundraiser run' where we had to get family members to sign documents that they would give x amount per kilometer we ran, they money was supposed to go to a new hall for P.E. Surprise surprise, im out of school for almost ten years now and there are no signs of a new hall yet.
However, does your son want to participate in that? How old is he, can he not go down the street alone ? If he is enthusiastic and too young to go alone, both of you could accompany him for an hour each (one side of the street with each of you) and 'sell' the rest of his almonds to your colleagues.
laurenmagick writes:
Hi there, you are going about it the wrong way. Give each one of your coworkers the money to cover the candy bars, and then bring your child in and let them walk around and sell their candy bars to the employees for a couple hours, or maybe just an hour. This will be teaching your child a sense of responsibility.
They do not need to know that you are paying for them, but they are learning the value of them doing a job and the responsibility of helping others with the fundraiser.
There is a reason that the organization has a rule that the family cannot buy all the candy bars, and you are trying to go against that rule which is not going to teach your child anything except the easy way out.
You do not want to do that with your child because it can turn them into an entitled person who always thinks they can get the easy way out. Or another idea is for you to take your child around the neighborhood and help them sell their candy bars.
I feel you are trying to take the lazy way out but just wanted to buy the bars so they are done. That is not what you want to teach your child. You want to teach your child that they have to work for what they want, just like you work for what you want.
Please consider these two options so you will raise a functioning member of society instead of one who wants everything handed to him on a spoon. I hope this helps you.
meatymagnus writes:
ETA - Your kid is supposed to do this, if they need help find another parent who is doing the run and ask them to take your kid as well, ask a grand-parents, or uncle to go with them.
Bring the boxes in to work and just leave them out with a note about your kid in the cafeteria for people to buy on the honor system. It's not that hard.