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Wife doesn't want to spend holidays with terminally ill MIL, husband calls her selfish.

Wife doesn't want to spend holidays with terminally ill MIL, husband calls her selfish.


When this wife is frustrated with her holiday plans, she asks Reddit:

'AITA for not wanting to spend the holidays with sick MIL?'

My mother in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer last year. We were told that it was very serious and we should make the most of our remaining time with her.

My husband and I live a 12 hours drive away from MIL and FIL and since the diagnosis we have spent every vacation and holiday with them.

We either fly, or we have to drive as we can't find anyone to babysit our cats. In total, we have spent fover a month and a half and thousand of dollars visiting them this year.

While I know that it's important to support my husband as much as I can, I'm starting to spiral.

We don't ever really get a relaxing break, we've not been able to save as much as we can and I've started to feel depressed about the lack of control over my life right now.

With the upcoming Christmas holidays, I discussed the idea of me visiting my parents (who I haven't seen in 6 months) while my husband visited his own.

My husband was very upset and kept telling me that this could be his mom's last Christmas with us and that I was being selfish. He told me that his dad was looking forward to me being there and that it would seem like I don't want to spend time with them.

I feel guilty that I am not being a supportive wife but I also feel justified in wanting to see my own family and enjoy a relaxing holiday for the first time in over a year.


Let's see what Reddit had to say.

swaldo863 writes:

This is the thing. Nothing is promised. Your parents could die in an auto accident tomorrow and his mom could live a decade more. Go see your family and recharge. NAH.

lvvtraveler writes:

NTA. Unfortunately, there is no correct answer. You are entitled to want to be close to family and recharge your own mental and emotional health.

It is also normal to want to spend time with your loved ones in the face of someone else’s impending death. I hope you and your husband are able to come to compromise. Are you able to split your time with your family and then join him with his?

So, is OP being selfish, or is husband being unreasonable? What do YOU think?

Sources: Reddit
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