'AITA for telling my husband he mishandled my daughter wetting the bed at 3am?'
"AITA for telling my husband he mishandled my daughter wetting the bed at 3am?"
Long story short, my daughter (3yo) started crying in her room at 3am, which is highly unusual for her. She's usually a very good sleeper. I heard her but was breastfeeding my son so I couldn't get up, so I woke my husband up and asked him to go see what was going on.
He came back a few minutes later with her in his arms and said she had an accident and was complaining her throat hurt.
He laid her in bed next to me while he changed his clothes (he got pee on his) and then picked her up and went back to her room, where he stayed with her the rest of the night. At no point did he ask me what to do or tell me what he was going to do.
I got up this morning and went into her room to tell him it was time to get her up for daycare and he said something about how he slept in pee all night. I asked him what he meant and he told me he put her back into her pee-soaked bed because he didn't know what else to do.
I told him there was another change of sheets under the wet sheets (I do this specifically so we can rip the top sheet and waterproof mattress cover off on the middle of the night and have a new set of sheets under it ready to go). He told me he forgot.
I left it alone because he was already in a bad mood, but later today I told him that he really shouldn't have put her back into a bed soaked in pee. He got upset and told me he didn't know what to do and I didn't give him any direction.
I told him I didn't realize he needed direction and that it seemed obvious that you wouldn't do that. It turned into a fight and now we're both upset with one another. AITA for telling him that he shouldn't have put her back in bed like that? Is this actually an acceptable response to a kid peeing the bed? AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
lovebeach6 writes:
NTA. He had other options but he chose to do something that was uncomfortable, lazy and unnecessary. He obviously forgot about the extra sheet set-up but he could have: Asked you where more sheets were since you were still awake, taken her to the couch, set up a temporary bed in your bedroom on the floor with dry blankets.
Instead, he decided to play the martyr, forcing her to also sleep on wet, urine-soaked sheets, which would have been so cold. Sleeping on wet sheets would be freezing. He's the AH without any common sense.
sallylemonhead writes:
Well, that will show you won’t it? NTA, this isn’t even incompetence, it’s manipulation. He wanted to show you that waking him up to handle a problem isn’t worth the trouble. He couldn’t just go to the couch? You’ve got a manipulative AH on your hands though.
cheekmo writes:
NTA. Husband only needed common sense to determine that letting your toddler sleep in her own urine is ill advised. Nor should he have required guidance as to how to change the sheets on a mattress.
He exhibited laziness in both his actions that night and his excuses the following morning. OP had every right to point out that when he is caring for his own child he’s the adult in the room and needs to act like one.