Mom watermarks photos of son before sending them to ex; he has a 'meltdown.' AITA?
When her cheating husband left her and her son, she was prepared to carry on alone and give him the best life she could. But when she saw that this absent father was posting all of her pictures of her son to his own social media, insinuating that he was a much more involved parent than he actually was, she got pissed. So she created a clever workaround...
"AITA for putting a watermark in my son's pictures every time I send them to his dad?"
I (23F) have a son (2M) with my ex-husband (25M). We divorced right after my son came into the world because I found out he was cheating. He pays child support but I work and handle all of the bills and expenses. He likes to make a big show for everyone and say that he 'bankrolls me', but he does not.
His Instagram has a lot of pictures of our son, but he isn't present in his life. He texts me every day saying that I need to send him a picture of our son for him to see if he is ok. When I send one, he posts it minutes after.
Recently I found out that he was dating a girl in my city. When I discovered it I was honestly pretty upset. He always told me that his job takes up all his time and that's why he doesn't have time to spend with our son.
I vented about all of this with a friend and, after a long conversation, she gave me an idea. From now on, every time I send my ex husband pictures of our baby, I put a watermark with my name across the picture. I did this today and he had a total meltdown. He called me an AH and said I was being a b*$ch. Now, as satisfied as I feel, I need to ask. AITA?
Here are some of the top reactions from readers:
NTA, he is using your pictures to make it seem like he is a present and involved father, when he is not. You could also stop sending him photos and just reply with 'Yup, James is fine today' but honestly he doesn't get to be mad that you aren't making it easier for him to pretend to be a good father.
If he wants to post pictures of your son, he should spend time with him and take his own pictures.
You could add a plausibly innocent speech bubble saying “I miss you dad!”, “Wish I could see you more often dada!” or if you wanna straight shoot: “It has been xxx days since my dad has visited me” to every pic.
Dad is a deadbeat neglecting his kid but using his baby mama and kid to pose and look good to others, no one is TA except him.
I wouldn't send pictures at all. If you want to have pictures of your son then come see him. It's not a grandparent, he's supposed to be a parent and he's not so I totally agree on the just saying he's fine and if he demands remind him that not only are you not obligated to send pictures you dont have to talk to him at all and it can be done through court.
NTA. Please just stop sending him pictures. When he doesn’t bear his parental responsibilities, he doesn’t get to enjoy his parental rights.
NTA. If he doesn't want to post watermarked pictures, he can take and post his own. He's using your photos to make himself look like an active and involved dad. You are under no obligation to facilitate that charade.
NTA. They're your photos of your child. Write whatever you want on them. Is it childish? Yeah sorta but so is your ex. Let him know that if he needs to seen his child every day he us welcome too but you have no responsibility to take photos for him.
You're not his wife or his photographer. Your divorced and a grown woman with your own life and he can no longer tell you what to do so quit doing what he tells you. This man left you with a baby and he still thinks he runs your life.