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Mom insists daughter has huge traditional wedding, daughter makes her pay.

Mom insists daughter has huge traditional wedding, daughter makes her pay.


When this bride to be is annoyed with her mother, she asks Reddit:

'AITA for telling my mom if she wants me to have a big traditional wedding, she has to pay for it?'

When my fiance and I first got engaged my mom, my dad, and my fiances parents all offered to help pay for the wedding.

As we talked about the kind of wedding we wanted it became clear neither my fiance or I are very interested in a huge traditional wedding in a church with a reception in a fancy venue.

We're both more comfortable with the idea of a nice little relaxed ceremony somewhere beautiful and intimate, which obviously has the added bonus of being cheaper.

My dad and my fiances parents are completely happy with this, but my mom is very opposed to the idea. She keeps trying to convince me that I'll regret it, that if we go with a small wedding it won't be special and we might as well just get married in a court house.

I'm her only child and she's upset she will never get the experience of seeing her kid get married in a big beautiful traditional wedding. This argument has been going on for a while and has come up in basically every conversation I've had with my mom for two weeks.

Eventually I told her that the only way we'll agree to a big traditional wedding is if she agrees to be responsible for paying for the entire wedding.

She can't really afford that so I figured that would shut the idea down. She said she already agreed to help pay for it and that the money from her, my dad, and my fiances family would pay for the wedding, but I insisted that since she is the only person who wants us to have that kind of wedding, she would need to be the one to pay for it.

All of it. Now my mom is really upset and I'm worried I went too far. AITA?

Let's find out.

togarsucks writes:

NTA. OP just gave her mom either A) the option of getting her way if she manages to somehow find a way to pay for the thing herself or B) just one more thing to complain about.

You’ve got the moral high ground OP, but this was not a smart move.

iamglory makes this point:

NTA. This is your choice with your fiance.aounda like Mom wants a spectacle out of it for her own benefit. Spending money on the wedding isn't as good as saving for a house, kids, car...something that will last more than a day.

I got married in a backyard and you know what...I would do it again. I think you need to talk to your fiance and decide what you want.

If Mom isn't happy, tell her to get married again but you like it small. Hell I would go to the courthouse and get it done and then do a nice family and close friend reception.

Well, looks like OP is in the clear. Is MOM TA? What do YOU think?

Sources: Reddit
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