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'My wife is secretly breastfeeding her nephew. Am I wrong to tell the parents?'

'My wife is secretly breastfeeding her nephew. Am I wrong to tell the parents?'


It's a bit of a complicated situation, I'm not sure wether I should speak up or not.

My wife's brother and his wife have an 8 months old baby. He's been mostly fed with formula as my BIL's wife was unable to breastfeed due to health issues. My wife has always been criticizing them for 'giving up on natural milk,' and depriving their baby from the benefits of it by going with formula. They've had countless arguments about it and my wife and MIL still think they're in the right.

The real problem was when I discovered that my wife's been breastfeeding their son (her nephew) whenever they drop him over before they go to dr appointments or run tests. My wife and I have a 10 months old son, but I didn't know she's been secretly breastfeeding her nephew til I walked in on her doing it.

I confronted her on it, and she said she was trying to give back to her nephew all the benefits his parents took away from him after they replaced breastfeeding with formula. I told her this was violating and that I would tell them immediately. She got mad and said I wouldn't dare.

Matter of fact, she said that she's doing them a favor by feeding their son and trying to regain his strength and prevent future health issues due to lack of mother's milk. We yelled at each other and I told her again that I would tell them.

She started begging me saying she's just trying to help and that she has her nephew's best interest st heart. She said if I tell them they won't ever let her see him so there's a lot at stake here.

ETA: Her brother and his wife had already brought formula for my wife to use so the whole excuse about the baby not getting fed is unreasonable.

From the comments:

sorryimbooked12 says:

Nta please tell them. Immediately. While there is nothing wrong with breastfeeding someone else's baby with permission she is hiding it from them. Which is wrong on so many levels same with her breast is best mentality. Fed is best, momma couldn't produce which is understandable, plenty of women have issues breast feeding. Even if they didn't have issues producing formula is still a great replacement.

nrgins says:

Wow, that is crazy! I understand your wife is passionate about the subject. But you don't just breastfeed someone else's baby without their permission! Wow!

sheba71smokey32 says:

Your wife is a HUGE AH!!!! How dare she presume it’s ok to nurse someone else’s child?!?!?!?! This is wrong on so many levels!!!! Tell your BIL & SIL. She has violated their trust. She deserves whatever fallout there may be.

Tough_Crazy_8362 says:

Is it morally wrong to breast feed a child that isn’t yours? No, it isn’t, as long as there is consent. Is it wrong to formula-shame, violently veer out of your lane, forcing your views and your breast milk in a non consensual situation? HELLLLL YES.

Lucky_Ad_1115 says:

Ywbta if you didn't tell them, what she is doing is way over the line. In no way shape or form should she be breastfeeding another person's child without their consent not only is she messing up his stomach with the different milk she's probably being doing it a long time, I would be absolutely furious if someone done that to my child

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