"AITA for 'forcing' a woman to nurse in public at my work?"
Without giving too much info, I (30F) work in a building that has a reception which consists of a security desk with a security guard always sitting there, gates that can be accessed with staff passes, stairs and an elevator up to the offices, and toilets. Aside from that, it's one long corridor with no furniture. It does not have public access.
My job often requires me to meet people at reception who sign in as guests for the day. I go to meet them, they get a visitor pass, they can quickly use the bathroom if they need, and then I lead them to where they need to be for the day. No one ever needs to hang around and this has never been an issue.
Yesterday I went down to meet someone who we expected as a guest for the day. She was at the reception with her whole family - husband, 2 kids, mother and father (or in-laws) and she was holding a small baby.
I assumed everyone was dropping her off so I went ahead with signing her in. Her mother or mother-in-law asks me where the rest of them can wait for her until she is finished (this would be for 8 hours).
I told her that the building cannot be accessed by members of the public but there are many places nearby such as cafes where they could wait for her.
The woman I was greeting told me that she needs her baby nearby because she is nursing and can have to do so any moment. I told her she can feel free to leave the building to nurse her child when she needs to and then come back, but her family can't be accommodated. We have no waiting areas.
She started to get annoyed and told me she needs to breastfeed straight away then if she won't be able to freely do so during the day.
As I mentioned, we have no waiting areas, no seating - people always just show up and go where they need to be. When she asked me where she could breastfeed, I showed her the disabled bathroom so she could have privacy (it's rarely ever used and when I looked inside it was spotless).
She was horrified and disgusted and started demanding to sit where the security guard sits, he said no because it's a restricted area.
She then sat on the bottom of the stairs and nurse there, making it clear that we left her with no choice and she was really annoyed. She then gave the baby to her family and I took her where she needed to be.
AITA for suggesting the private disabled bathroom to her? I thought I did my best with finding a solution considering the fact that this building has no public facilities whatsoever.
The building is high security. We don't have private rooms that are not occupied, and most of the time they are not accessible to outside departments anyway.
She knew what to expect and she had my contact email for at least 2 weeks prior to showing up - she could have explained all of this to me ahead of time and asked for suggestions on where to go. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
confusedat98 writes:
NTA, the woman was clearly not prepared for the appointment and who brings their family to an eight hour meeting? Don’t feel bad.
tacoszonkey writes:
NTA. This grown woman brought her entire family to an 8 hr meeting. It was inappropriate to do so. She knew she had the meeting and she should have planned accordingly. Bringing her infant was wrong-headed and entirely unnecessary.
She should have pumped before the meeting and left her child in the care of her husband. This is why Jesus came down from Mount Olympus and invented the b-pump.
trappedsuburbs writes:
NTA Bfing in a restroom is a rite of passage for moms. It’s not ideal, but it’s not so unusual to make a big deal out of it. Especially since the disabled restroom was private, it was perfectly adequate.
And yes, I have bf in a restroom before. We survived. Honestly, she should have just brought the baby with her and worn him or her in a sling.