Woman asks if she's wrong to not let BF's kids and his mom move into her house.
When you're a new mom it's a lot of pressure. When this mom is conflicted about her husband's mother and kids she asks Reddit:
'AITA BC I don't want to take in his mother and kids?'
Recently, my fiance and I just had a baby after struggling with IVF for years. He has three previous children from two separate relationships and a mom who lives with her questionable boyfriend not too far away.
I am buying a home, I am putting the money down myself and I am furnishing this home and paying the mortgage without his help. But he wants to move his kids in and he wants to move his mother in and he keeps saying that I should be okay with that as we are a family.
I'm not. I've waited a long time to start my own family, and I really don't want to take in his kids be the financial breadwinner for four new people and be a stranger in my own house.
I made it clear to him that if he's going to move in he has to help with the bills and it is our home with our new child. I feel like his exes are so excited to lob off their kids on me and his mother is just looking to leave her bad relationship and come live for free in my house.
I feel used by all of this and I feel like he's not considering how I feel at all. I'm a new mother I want my new home with my new family on my terms. Am I the a******?
Let's find out!
tangrysushi writes:
NTA, why can’t his kids just come and visit? Why do they HAVE to live with you? Girl absolutely not, that’s why I don’t deal with men who have kids. They really think kids aren’t baggage when they are.
Those kids need to be with THEIR mothers and visit when he wants to see them tf? Also YOUR NAME is on the mortgage so you have the say so, he isn’t even your husband yet.
As for his mom that’s also a hell no, if he wants to make it happen then he needs to help with all the bills and pay the mortgage, child please. You want a stress free life after having a baby not dealing with people and their bs and if he has a issue he can leave and go be with his kids and his mom.
You’re paying for everything anyways, is he even helping out financially? People see someone being the bread winner and their eyes light up like gold. Girl NTA.
happykitten5 writes:
YTA did you think he was just going to drop his kids and play house with you? If you’re in a relationship with a man with kids, the kids are a part of the package. If there is a custody agreement, the moms are not just handing their kids to you.
comparisonsuper876 disagrees:
NTA. DO NOT LET ANY OF THESE PEOPLE INTO YOUR HOUSE INCLUDING YOUR FIANCÉ, THEY WILL NEVER LEAVE AND YOULL BE ATUCK FOOTING THE BILL FOREVER.