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Woman kicks in-laws out of 2 year old son's birthday party. AITA?

Woman kicks in-laws out of 2 year old son's birthday party. AITA?


When this woman is upset with her in-laws, she asks Reddit:

"AITA for “kicking out” my husbands parents from our sons birthday party?"

Backstory: I (28f) come from a messy divorce household. My entire life I dealt with; “this is your dads year for your birthday/Christmas/etc” to the point where HOURS were even divided up so I wasn’t with one parent longer than the other.

I swore I would never put my son through the same thing. My parents still hate each other and I know if one parent is involved then the other won’t be but that ultimately is their choice to make.

Ok, here we go. My son is turning two this year and I’m planning on a small party since I know he’s not gonna remember it and I don’t want to stress myself out over a party for two year olds. I told both my parents that they will both be invited and I will hold no I’ll will should they choose not to come. It is what it is.

Well, one thing I forgot is that my MIL and her sister also have the same kind of relationship. My MIL and I have NO relationship. We can be civil towards each other when necessary but that’s about it.

Her sister and I, however, have an AMAZING relationship. We talk almost everyday I’ve visited her a few times and she’s come to us. So I sent the same text to both of them.

Spark noting the text: “no one will be excluding from being invited to my sons birthday and I hope that we can all be adults for a couple hours for my sons sake” MiL’s sister said she could just ignore her sister but now MIL...

has said they will not come if she is there; which circles back to the fact that I will not have “custody” birthdays so I just said while that is unfortunate, I understand and they can come visit another time.

My husband (29m) thinks that I should tell aunt to come visit another time so his parents can attend but I think it was their choice to not be apart of this celebration and that they could have just been adults for a max of 3 hours one day a year but are choosing to exclude themselves. So AITH?

Let's see what readers thought.

unicornfail7 writes:

NTA! I had a similar situation except it was my grandparents. My childhood consisted of all events being split between them. That was infuriating enough, i can't imagine what it must have been like when it's your parents and constant.

Good on you for stopping it now. My family let it go on for 40 odd years until us grandchildren stopped it with my older brothers wedding. We sat them all down and pretty much said everyone is invited, be adults, balls in their court.

STICK TO YOUR GUNS. You don't want this becoming generational like mine did!

saltdivine6b writes:

I think your approach is brilliant. And you’re really taking the “begin as I intend to go on” approach. You’re nipping any attempted BS in the bud before it starts.

As an aside- your MIL sounds like a pill. She can’t pull up her big girl panties long enough to attend her grandson’s birthday.

Ask your husband why he’s willing to reward shitty behavior. His own mother is making his child’s birthday about her. And rather than put up healthy boundaries he’s falling over to appease her. NTA.

novastar writes:

NTA like the Aunt said. They can be civil for the baby and ignore each other. Doesn’t have to have fights or anything. My aunt and uncle are the same way. They can’t stand each other. But for my grandmothers sake they will be “nice” while visiting. They say hi and then don’t talk to the other unless needed.

Looke like OP is NTA. What do YOU think?

Sources: Reddit
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