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Mom sets son up with friend's daughter, she cheats, then shares she's pregnant.

Mom sets son up with friend's daughter, she cheats, then shares she's pregnant.

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Parents sometimes try to set their children up with their friend's kids.

It makes sense. They know them, they like them, it's comfortable. But one woman regrets deeply her decision to set her son up with her friend's daughter.

'Am I wrong for making my son take a paternity test?'

Icy_Acanthaceae9635

This is a mess, and I would appreciate opinions from unbiased people, it was recommended that I post here.

I F39 have two kids, M17 and F10. When I was 21 I had a one night stand which resulted in my son Austin, the father, wanting nothing to do with my child.

When my son was 3 I met my husband Mark M38. My son adores my husband and calls him father. Austin met his current girlfriend through Mark's best friend Alan, her father. Macy and Austin have been close since they were young and we were all thrilled when we found out they were dating.

After we found out, Mark and I sat Austin down and explained that we're happy for him but we needed him to know the importance of safe sex whether it was happening or not. He was disgusted but said he understood and we left it at that.

For context, my son is what others describe as shy and soft spoken. He's really sensitive and takes harsh comments/actions to heart. We thought everything was fine with him until he came home crying, he eventually told us Macy had cheated on him.

I was angry and urged with my son to leave her, but my husband calmed us both and asked to speak with Austin privately.

Essentially he asked Austin what he wanted to do and if he wanted us to stop seeing Macy and her father, Austin said he didn't want that and wanted to work things out with Macy. I was upset but didn't say anything, ever since that happened, I've hated seeing her around. All I think about when I see her is my son distressed and crying his eyes out. I act cordial around her but I don't like her.

Around February, Austin came home looking rather upset again so I sat down with him and asked what's going on? I wasn't expecting to hear him say what he said to me 'Macy's pregnant.'

I was furious, I told him I expected better from him. I also said that before anything happened, he needed to do a paternity test.

He was angry that I suggested she cheated again, but I didn't like how she was suddenly pregnant.

When Mark came home from work, I filled him in and he was equally upset, we all sat down and discussed it. Austin explained that I demanded a paternity test was done, and Mark wasn't happy to hear that. I explained that she's cheated before, she could've cheated again.

That led to a huge argument before we all calmed down, I asked if her parents knew. Apparently not, he said she agreed to tell them tonight. And sure enough, about an hour later Mark gets an angry call from Alan demanding that my son marries his daughter, and if Austin refuses he demands that he pay child support and stay out of this kid's life.

Of course we were all angry and exhausted, so I said that nothing was happening until a paternity test was done and I wasn't taking the word of a cheating little girl.

He blew up at us and it was radio silence after the call, Macy was told she can no longer see Austin outside of school and he took it out on me.

A few weeks ago, Alan contacted us and agreed to do a paternity test. I asked why the sudden change but he ignored me, he said he set up the appointment for May 5th. Austin went with Mark, he said he didn't want to be around me. It stung and I won't lie, it made me cry when he said that.

Results finally came in a few nights ago and he isn't the father, he was shattered. Instead of apologizing, he screamed that this was my fault and he'd have never known, he hasn't said much to me since.

Maybe I was wrong for making him do a paternity test, but I was only looking out for my son. Was I wrong for making him take a paternity test?

Here were the top comments from readers:

chablismouth

NTA but I get why a 17 year old kid whose pregnant girlfriend cheated on him is acting this way even though it’s unfortunate. He’s heartbroken and he’s being a dick to you, but I’d be shocked if he acted rationally tbh.

This is one of those times where you’re right, but you’re not going to get thanked for it….yet. Eventually he’ll be happy that he dodged this bullet and didn’t become a teen dad, and he’ll be glad that someone in his life was behaving logically in a chaotic situation. It might take a while though.

Potential-Section107

NTA - He's taking his hurt out on you. He'll come around eventually.

HunterDangerous1366

NTA. Yes, he's not happy with you now, but I think that's because you've shattered his fantasy that it'll all work out and they'll live happily ever after together.

Better that the test was done, than him be pressured by Macys dad/family to marry her, to be potentially left heart broken all over again down the line AND paying child support for a child that's not his.

Proud_Ad_8830

NTA, you did what’s best for him in the long run.

LonelyPresent3789

NTA but I’m really confused about your husband supporting him working it out with Macy when she first cheated because of how sensitive Austin is emotionally. I hope Austin is in therapy even if his behavior is normal for a teen bc I’m worried he has low self worth. I’m also worried he is going to go back to Macy and try to sign the bc.

It's a pretty intense story and difficult to say what would be the right thing to do. If you were the OP, what would you tell your son?

Sources: Reddit
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