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Woman asks if she was wrong to tell BF's mom that paternity leave isn't 'a vacation.'

Woman asks if she was wrong to tell BF's mom that paternity leave isn't 'a vacation.'

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It's normal to struggle with your relationship to your MIL, or in this case, your boyfriend's mother. It's hard enough being a parent, and in this doozy of a situation, it seems super difficult for this young mother. When this woman gets mad at her boyfriend's mother for treating his paternity leave like a vacation, she takes to the popular Reddit forum to ask:

'AITA for telling my boyfriend’s mom that my maternity leave is not supposed to be a vacation?'

similarput1285 writes:

I’m 37 weeks pregnant now and my boyfriend took 3 weeks off work to stay with me so that we can adjust to being parents to a newborn. This is my first and I’m very nervous and really need the support right now.

My boyfriend’s mother took it upon herself to schedule a “paternity vacation” for my boyfriend for the last two weeks of his leave. She came over for dinner and surprised him with it. It’s an all expense paid vacation to Italy for my boyfriend as his paternity present.

She gave me a jade stoned bracelet and a matching newborn one for the baby as it’s part of their culture to give the family stone to the mother and child once they enter the family. That was very kind of her.

However I told her that his leave was for helping with the baby. She was taken aback and said that he would be with me for a week and that was long enough. Her husband never even stayed at the hospital with her when her son was born.

I told her and my boyfriend that I didn’t want him to go and that she should have asked first before buying such an extraordinary gift. She left in tears because I was “ungrateful” and ruining her sons experience.

My boyfriend pretty much agrees that he should go for at least a week because she paid for it but I really wanted him to stay with me and bond with our daughter. AITA?

Well, let's see what Reddit had to say on this one.

NTA at all, what am asinine idea! A vacation AWAY from his one week old baby? What in the literal f*** was his mother thinking? - ezekielvee

NTA. My perspective is that BF's mom was raised to believe that the mother should be taking care of herself during pregnancy. After all, her own husband wasn't there for when she gave birth. I don't think it's emotional incest, I think it's internalized misogyny - progress76

His dream vacation is missing the first two weeks of his daughter’s life? He does realise that she will never, ever be brand new again, right? In two weeks’ time, she’s going to be so different. He’ll miss a lot of first moments. - corkbullet

Well, there you have it folks. OP is NOT the AH. The boyfriend's mom is, and maybe the boyfriend is too! And maybe there IS some internalized misogyny going on here. What do YOU think?

Sources: Reddit
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