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Woman remarries ex-husband who cheated. Won't let his 'affair child' move in. AITA?

Woman remarries ex-husband who cheated. Won't let his 'affair child' move in. AITA?


When this stepmom is unable to help her ex-husband out, she asks Reddit:

'AITA for refusing to let my husbands affair baby live with us for awhile?'

I married my husband very young. Three years into our marriage we got a divorce, because he had an affair and got his mistress pregnant. We were split for 5 years, then decided we had changed as people, and reconciled for our daughter(we had before the divorce) and for ourselves, with help of counseling.

We’ve now been together 6 years. During the years apart I had another child with a serious partner who sadly passed away.

A few days ago we get a call, from my husbands ex mistress. She says her job wanted her to fly out of state this weekend for an opportunity but it is in possible with her son and asked us if we would be willing to take him in so short notice.

Usually my husband gets a hotel and stays with his son when she flies out, but she said this time would be a longer term stay. I told my husband absolutely not, that wasn’t happening. He said I was being unfair, and that he cares for my daughter (who’s from my late partner) like his own, and I should do the same.

I screamed at him and said “my daughter isn’t the product of my affair, absolutely no way is he staying here.” He got angry and said that I was being ridiculous and a b&%ch, because the child is innocent. In my eyes it hurts me too much to look at that boy. Aita?

Let's see what readers had to say. They were torn.

onlytext writes:

You married him. He cheated. Had a son. You divorced him. You remarried him. Did you think the kid was going to dissapear? You chose to forgive the affair when you remarried him, that forgiveness has to include the child. YTA and you know it.

owlplantain writes:

YTA. You had every right to be angry with him and never forgive him for cheating, but when you marry someone, you accept who they are. When you remarried him, he was someone who had cheated on you and had a child. By taking new vows with him, you put that behind you.

You might only marry him on the condition that the behavior is in the past - no more cheating, but the past can’t change, and you can’t hold it over him. If you do, then YOU are breaking your vows. It’s not his fault this time.

osamadodo writes:

Wow! You’ve won the YTA award here! I’m rarely at a loss for words. Your poor stepson. Your husband is also an AH for allowing this situation in the first place. If you accepted him after infidelity, you accepted his child and baby mama as a package deal.

Can you not imagine if one of your children were in the same position?!? The child did not betray you, your husband did!

Looks like OP is TA! Any advice for her?

Sources: Reddit
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