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Woman gets called out for 'showing off' with fancy white chocolate cake at party. AITA?

Woman gets called out for 'showing off' with fancy white chocolate cake at party. AITA?


Jealousy and insecurity are normal human emotions, but some people really cannot handle being outshone - to a point where it's nearly debilitating.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she was wrong for bringing a fancy white chocolate cake to a chocolate themed party. She wrote:

"AITA for bringing white chocolate cake when asked to bring chocolate dessert?"

I (24F) recently moved to the city most of my paternal families live in. I grew up in another city and went to college on a different coast and wasn’t close with them, spending only 6 Christmas with them growing up. I visited everyone in person once when I moved so they know I’m living in the same city.

I’m a pretty good cook and baker, so when I was invited to a potluck family party at my grandparents’ I brought chicken stew which received a lot of praise. One of my aunts asked if I also bake and I said yes, showing them a few pics of my baked goods. My cousin Lisa (30F) then invited me to her little girl gathering, telling me it’s a drink and dessert party and that the theme is chocolate.

I made a beautiful white chocolate cake for the party. It wasn’t big as Lisa told me there would be like ten people attending but because it was small I was able to make it a little fancy with silver and white winter decorations. Everyone exclaimed how beautiful the cake was and when Lisa put it on the table it stood out as the rest was different shades of chocolate brown. My cake was praised.

The food and drink were delicious. I hung out with my cousins and met Lisa’s friends and her husband’s family. I thought everyone was nice. Later, Lisa called me, not exactly complaining but telling me next time I should keep to the theme of the party. I told her I did as white chocolate IS chocolate.

Lisa said that her husband’s sister and a couple of nieces thought it was inappropriate of me to bring a dish that stood out so much, completely ignoring the party theme. They felt all everyone talked about was my cake. They asked Lisa to tell me to “tone it down” or don’t invite them or me to the same party because they can’t stand someone so attention-seeking.

Personally I don’t think I did anything wrong but this is a group of three people thinking the same thing, so AITA?

Redditors had strong thoughts on the matter.

Independent-Length54 wrote:

NTA. If Lisa wanted a chocolate party where everything was brown, she should have said that. If she wanted a chocolate party without white chocolate, she should have said that. Absent other instruction, you honored the theme. I'm sensing that Lisa is just jealous of your baking/cooking skills.

FYI for the future - and I'm sure you know this - but white chocolate contains no cocoa / cacao solids (and sometimes not even cocoa butter), so it's debatable whether it's chocolate at all. Also, many people who like chocolate explicitly do not like white chocolate. I suspect even if you had asked Lisa her opinion on white chocolate, she would have still found a reason to be unhappy.

stroppo wrote:

NTA. If people are so put out by the idea of a *cake* taking everyone's attention, they are people to be avoided.

Fuzzy-Constant wrote:

NTA because it's not a big deal, but in my opinion white chocolate is NOT chocolate. So Lisa's not wrong, but her family is being ridiculous about caring so much.

Conscious_Drawer8356 wrote:

NTA what is wrong with people being so insecure? Chocolate theme was met with your white chocolate cake. She specifically asked you to bring a baked good after seeing your pics. She knew your talent and sounds like these other people are kinda jerks. Don’t doubt yourself or your talent. It sounded beautiful and fit the theme and season wonderfully!

Edit: to all of you who are being well ick about OP not following the chocolate theme, have you never watched a baking show?? What about ruby chocolate?

You sound like those meanies at the party 😭

OP is NTA here at all, she was just surrounded by immature and petty people.

Sources: Reddit
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