Dad takes shirtless pic of self-conscious teen; so he breaks into dad's phone. AITA?
Is 'please, no photos!' a legally binding phrase?
When a teenager made it extremely clear that he wanted a vacation free of photographs of himself, his father did not seem to care. So, the kid took matters into his own hands.
'AITA (Am I the a-hole) for accessing my dad's phone and deleting a pic of me?'
Old_Vegetable9548 writes:
My family and family friends were abroad at a hotel resort. I (18M) don't like shirtless pictures of me being taken.
This holiday, I was pretty much allowed to do my own thing. That was mainly, sleep, eat and enjoy the pool. To that end, my days only ever overlapped with family and family friends in the evenings.
One night, halfway through the holiday, during dinner I told them that I would come with them to the beach, the beach was a 10min walk away. I specifically said 'no photos at the beach'.
And they agreed to this.
At this point also, its been a fact for years that I don't like my photo being taken. So it's nothing new.
Skip to next day, we are walking to the beach and I remind them. 'Please don't take any photos of me.'
OP is leaving zero room for confusion.
At the beach, all is well with the world. I decide to put sunscreen on and to do this I take off my top. Then once done, I go for a swim in the sea. I didn't put my top back to swim becuase I didn't want it to get wet.
I'm swimming and my dad takes pictures of me without my consent. I shake my head, put my arms up and tell him to stop but he continues and smiles while doing so.
I then start to confront him 'why did you do that? I specifically asked you not to.' Then he goes on the defensive: 'you're MY son, I can take pictures of you if I want.'
Very mature!
I later sneak onto his phone and delete the pictures myself and he gets even more annoyed.
Also for anyone wondering, if he had asked me if he could take a photo, I would have put my shirt back on and let him.
I understand that he wanted to take a pic of me to comemerate the time at the beach and thats cool... but he did the one thing I asked him not to.
And I know these photos go on Facebook and that's my exact fear. I don't need a shirtless photo being seen by all of my extended family and friends.
There is also the part where I know changing/accessing things on people's phones is not cool but I know he wasnt going to delete the pics.
What do you think? Is dad the a-hole for taking the pic or OP for breaking into someone else's phone?
Here's what Reddit had to say...
NTA (Not the a-hole). Your dad is doing that thing parents do sometimes where they think they own their kids. It is a thing my parents did and my hubby's parents did and sometimes they still do. I try not to do it with my kids. But it is a bad thing lots of parents do.
YMBTA (You might be the a-hole) And only for ONE reason, hes your dad. I am assuming he is not posting these photos or showing them to others, he is just keeping photos of his son. I am also assuming you guys have a great relationship and this is the only REAL hiccup between you two.
I am not saying he was right, I am just saying he is your dad and honestly I can see his side. I know I prefer candid photos of my kids vs posed or staged. He knows you dont like your photo taken but remember, you will always be his little boy that he can screw around with. All I am saying is maybe cut him some slack.
ESH (Everyone sucks here). You know what you did wasn’t right. Not your phone = keep out.
CONGRATULATIONS, You have just admitted to a probable crime. This is great. YTA (You're the a-hole), you cant go around policing what people around you do. So is your dad, but a lot less than you. If you was on your own property, you can say no. If its in a public area, then you can have no say to it.
Dependant on the country, you touching or using someone else's computer or devices without permission is actually illegal, and potentially land you in prison/jail.
Man go to therapy, get some confidence good lord.
NTA. That’s a violation of your privacy and you did what you had to do. I grew up with a parent like that and it caused a lot of damage. I’m sorry he treats you that way.
Looks like Reddit is totally split on this one...
Who do you think the ultimate a-hole is?