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Man tells GF she can't eat his Clif bars if she doesn't replace them, they get in fight.

Man tells GF she can't eat his Clif bars if she doesn't replace them, they get in fight.


We all know the phrase 'sharing is caring' is true in most instances.

But in a long-term relationship, sharing is not only caring, but it's also an imperative that can create serious conflict over relatively petty issues. For example, the question of how much of your special snacks and treats you should share can be the site for many an argument. And however silly it might sound, it all adds up.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a man asked if he was wrong for telling his GF she can't eat his Clif bars anymore.

He wrote:

AITA for telling my girlfriend she can't have my Clif Bars anymore?

I recently started buying peanut butter Clif Bars, which I eat exclusively while working out (I cycle about 300-400 km/week). A few weeks ago, my girlfriend caught wind of this, and she absolutely loves peanut butter.

She was asking me if she can have a bar every now and then, and I told her to go ahead, but that I'd also appreciate it if she would replace the ones she eats, since I save them for my workouts. Since I keep track of how many I eat per workout, I know how many I should have left.

While prepping for a 200 km trip yesterday though, I saw that I was completely out of Clif Bars. It was also 5 AM, so nothing was open to buy some new ones. I ended up having to cook some last minute rice cakes, which meant I was about an hour late for the start, which kinda threw my entire day's schedule out of whack.

When I got home, I told my gf that I don't want her eating my Clif Bars anymore if she doesn't replace them, and that she should buy her own directly instead. She got defensive and told me that she was planning to replace them, but just hadn't gotten around to it yet. Today she came by my home office and let me know that she bought me a new box, with a sarcastic 'you're welcome' at the end.

AITA? I thought I was being pretty reasonable in asking that she either replace them or get her own, but I've had a few friends and family tell me that I'm overreacting over just energy bars and that it's not that big of a deal if she eats some of mine.

TL;DR: GF eats my energy bars without replacing them. I then told her to stop eating mine and get her own.

As with most snack-related issues, this inspired passionate responses from the Reddit community.

theasholethrowawa wrote:

NTA: It's a known rule...never take the last of someone else's food/snack.

MaybeAWalrus wrote:

NTA. Taking a bar once in a while and replacing them is one thing. Eating the LAST ONE is plain disrespectful.

cuervoguy2002 wrote:


She wanted to replace them on HER schedule, something that doesn't work for you. I'm not sure why if she likes them so much, buying her own is such a problem.

Normal-Height-8577 wrote:

NTA. Your friends and family are technically correct but absolutely missing the point - it's not a problem if she eats some of your bars...but she didn't do that. She ate all of them without replacing them, leaving you without supplies for a 200km cycle trip. That could have been dangerous. I think they're also missing the point that for your girlfriend they're cool snacks, but for you, they're essential fuel.

Margenius wrote:

NTA. The issue here is actually that your girlfriend doesn't consider you when she goes about her day. You don't mind sharing these things, you mind having a consistent plan for something that sounds like a big party of your life that you reguarly can't actually do because she has made it harder. It might be she doesn't get why this is important to you beyond the bars?

Like how frustrating and disappointing it is and how it's sad and stressful when you get up with your plan only to find she's put you in this position by not thinking about/remembering your schedule again?

If she doesn't know that part (which to be fair she should be able to guess, but if we didn't say all the things we think our partners should just know relationships would all be doomed, and if she only knows you came home with this new rule and not the whole story then it might feel like a sudden escalation to her).

Then I think it's worth having a conversation about what this actually means to your day and goals and feelings and mood to see if that changes how passive aggressive her reaction has been.

OP is definitely NTA here, and it seems like his GF needs a bit of a wakeup call to understand how frustrating this is for him.

Sources: Reddit
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