16 people share the dumbest excuse they've ever heard for cheating on a partner.

'I didn't think you'd ever find out,' 'it didn't mean anything,' or 'I didn't even enjoy it'--anyone who has endured the uncomfortable breakup conversation post-cheating is familiar with this pathetic monologue...

If you're in a strict monogamous relationship, the best thing to do if you're noticing your wandering eye is to tell your partner before you end up in someone else's bed. Of course, if rom-coms and the divorce rate has taught us anything, that almost never happens. So, when a Reddit user asked, 'What’s the worst excuse for cheating?' scorned lovers everywhere were ready to share the hilariously stupid, lame, or embarrassing explanations someone has given for cheating on a partner.

1.

It was an accident. Like...what do you mean an accident? - Honey_trickle

2.

“I was looking for an excuse to break up.' If you want to break up, why don’t you just…break up? - Lion214

3.

“I performed a soul retrieval on him, and discovered that he was my soulmate, for thousands of past lives and thousands of lives into the future.' I was told this out of the blue, after a 21 year relationship, 18 years of marriage with two small children. - karl722

4.

“I just have a flirty personality!” - PitcherTrap

5.

'I'm an alpha and that's what we do.' Yes, that's a real one. - Weekend_Reader

6.

My dad's excuse was “you weren’t noticing me anymore, there was no intimacy” I was 6 months old and my mom was pregnant with my sister - Charming_Tax2311

7.

It was the alcohol, not me. - ErazerHeadz

8.

One that I heard from a former marriage counselor was a woman who claimed her husband was so affectionate, hard-working, and considerate, she developed an inferiority complex and dealt with it by cheating. - Oldspice0493

9.

“You’re too nice. I’m doing you a favor.” - jmack2424

10.

I thought about you the whole time - Ok_boomer_1243

11.

“I thought y’all were friends.” An actual quote from an ex my immediate response. “HOW THE F*CK DOES THAT MAKE IT ANY BETTER?!?” She had absolutely no reply, just sat there with her jaw dropped. - Gunn_Show

12.

It was my birthday and I really wanted to - localgasgiant

13.

'He caught me cheating, serves him right for spying on me.' Random girl I overheard talking on her phone - STUBOING

14.

'I thought it was funny you didn’t know.' Yup, that actually happened to me. - Chez_Henri

15.

“What was I supposed to do?!” - RandomGuy886

16.

'I just can't control myself, she was coming onto me!' - Due-Preparation5104