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Wife fires sitter for calling ambulance when infant stops breathing; 'you wasted money.'

Wife fires sitter for calling ambulance when infant stops breathing; 'you wasted money.'

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"AITA for yelling at my wife for firing our babysitter and making her cry because she called an ambulance?"

verycooldad89

Hello Reddit! I have just downloaded Reddit because my niece said I should post this story to the AITA board so here I am! I am not very good with technology so forgive me but I'll probably be messing this whole post up! 😂😂😂

So, basically here's what happened. Me and my wife hired our babysitter, who we've been going to for years. We have 2 sons and a daughter and we've been hiring her since my oldest son was a baby (though it was mostly her mom looking after the baby while she was 'helping' so we gave her a couple of dollars for that 😂😂😂).

She's now 16 and can look after the kids all on her own and my oldest two love her! (My youngest is only 7 months so I'm not sure he really gets it yet 😂😂😂, but he seems relatively happy when he's with her). This Friday, my kid's daycare has been closed for renovations and Daisy (our babysitter) has kindly offered to take care of them after school, from 3:30-6pm!

I get home from work at 6 and my wife gets home at half 6, however, I got home early from work at half five. When I got home I found my wife yelling at Daisy while Daisy was just sobbing and apologizing.

I asked my wife what was going on and all she did was just start yelling that Daisy had cost us a bunch of money, my first thought was that she'd broken something, but my wife wasn't telling me what it was.

She told Daisy she wouldn't be paying her for her time and to "get the f*U&K out of our house and never come back or she'd call the police". Daisy then ran out crying and I left my wife to calm down while I comforted my kids (they were all crying in a different room while my wife yelled at Daisy).

When everything had calmed down, I got the full story from my wife. So here's what happened: My mother had been looking after the kids until 3:30 while we were at work.

This was Daisy's first time looking after my youngest son, though we knew we could trust her with the babies since she looked after my daughter alone when she was a baby.

Something important that you should know is that my youngest son has breath holding episodes, which occur when he gets frustrated or is in pain, and he will just hold his breath, to stop them you just have to blow on the baby or they will just snap out of it on their own.

They're completely normal and relatively safe in babies, however, the episodes can sometimes cause passing out and blueness, and it's normal and he usually wakes up within a few seconds.

To cut a long story short my mom forgot to tell Daisy what to do if that happens, and when my son passed out, Daisy panicked and called 911, and then my wife. My wife is now angry that Daisy called 911 for 'nothing' and has now wasted our money on an ambulance ride.

Me and my wife are now arguing because I think Daisy did the right thing but my wife doesn't, yesterday we got into a heated argument, we both said some hurtful stuff and she is now staying with her mother for a few days while she 'thinks over my priorities in the relationship'. AITA?

Here were the top rated comments from readers:

OkeyDokey654

NTA. Your wife is truly, truly awful and I hope you’re having her read these responses.

The OP responded here:

verycooldad89

That may be a good idea once she calms down a bit.

solo_throwaway254247

And Daisy is owed an apology, her full pay and a good reference for her next babysitting gig.

abstractengineer2000

Better safe than sorry. Without information, Daisy did the only right thing she could do, She called 911. OP's Wife is a triple ahole, one for not telling about the situation to the caretaker, 2 for scolding Daisy a minor for what even an adult would find difficult to do, 3 for going after OP for pointing out her error.

Skywalker87

I’m a parent to three. If I was watching a baby and they turned blue and passed out I’d be calling 911. OP’s wife is a psycho.

majesticgoatsparkles

HOW in the world did neither you nor your wife tell the sitter about this in advance. It wasn’t on the grandmother but on you two AS THE PARENTS to inform the sitter of any special issues. Your wife is yelling at the sitter for your and your wife’s own failing here.

Your wife is absolutely the AH for her conduct towards the sitter, but you both are AHs for putting the sitter in what had to have been an incredibly scary situation. You BOTH owe the sitter the most sincere apology ever.

MLeek

NTA. Your wife behaved reprehensibly. Daisy deserves a medal and an apology. She was unprepared with information she required. If you want an expert who’d already knew this, then you don’t get to hire a teenager to babysit and you’re wife needs to get comfy paying a lot more for a professional adult nanny who comes with this sort of knowledge.

Your wife prioritized money over the safety of the children and the most basic respect and kindness towards Daisy. You may also want to be reconsidering some things. Give Daisy the money and apology your wife owes her.

EDIT: Also, would strongly encourage you to apologize to her parents as well, and make sure they are aware of the trauma Daisy experienced. She might have been scarred or ashamed to tell her parents the full truth and it would be kind for you to support her on that front as well.

Tarniaelf

1000x this. You withheld medical info from your babysitter. Sids is a thing and I am a grown adult and would worry about sids in that scenario. How in the h e double hockey sticks was she supposed to be able to tell the difference?

Furthermore, be prepared to have trouble hiring future sitters, if Daisy goes on your local Facebook childcare providers groups and lambasts you. And I expect she well could-and should.

I would want to know if I were about to sit for a family that was so very abusive and unhinged. You definitely want to get this sorted, if you want to have another sitter ever again. NTA but your wife is beyond that.

Much_Independent9628

NTA. My little brother is a paramedic. They just lost a child because the parents waited too long to call 911 because the child did exactly what your child does. Turns out the child was actually choking. That child is now dead. Easily would have survived had they called 911 as they were nearby both the scene and hospital.

Apart-Ad-6518

NTA

"my mom forgot to tell Daisy what to do if that happens, and when my son passed out, Daisy panicked and called 911"

Of course she'd do that. She totally did the right thing. She then called your wife, also the right thing. Your wife shouted, swore at & made a 16 year old kid cry, who would've already had a bad scare about your son. That's just not ok on any level.

Daisy needs to be paid for her time & your wife needs to apologize to her. Why she's entrenching her position now she knows Daisy didn't even know your son did that is really puzzling. Sounds like you've lost a good sitter too.

So, do you think the mother in this story is way out of line or do you think she has a right to be upset at the babysitter?

Sources: Reddit
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