Bride demands wedding photographer leave MOH out of all wedding photos. AITA?
When this woman feels upset about her MOH, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for keeping my MOH out of my wedding photos?"
A few weeks ago I got married to my childhood sweetheart Cole (26 M) for my 28th birthday. We spent a lot of the summer doing things that lead up to the wedding. We had a rehearsal dinner first with the best men, bridesmaids and family only...not including anyone who isn’t specifically part of the wedding.
For the rehearsal dinner we asked people not to wear any white as I was going to and everyone said that it was standard to not wear white anyways. My maid of honor wore white but said that her other dresses were being washed ready for my bachelorette so I let it slide.
Then it was the last time me and my fiancé would see each other until the wedding so we had a joined bachelor and bachelorette party and she wore the same dress. I figured her other dresses would now be in the suitcase so once again I let it slide.
On the week before the wedding my fiancé had his boys only bachelor party and I had my girls only bachelorette and everything was going well. I found out my wedding dress still hadn’t arrived and the wedding was in 4 days. Luckily there was a bridal shop which had my dream dress style.
The style I wanted was a short dress with a more ball gown styled skirt that just zipped around the dress so that I could wear the short dress underneath to dance in.
I found a plain front with a floral patterned lace on the sleeves and a backless back which was stunning and seemed very me! I found the same dress but it was a less plain front which was very similar to the dress I was waiting for so I tried it on and it fit perfectly.
The day of the wedding comes and my maid of honor wore the dress I’d picked out and no white was seen until the after party... I noticed she was wearing the exact same dress as me.
It was the plain version I originally looked at and I was furious but because as far as everyone was aware she picked her dress for the night already and she’d sent us photos but the original dress she showed was a light blue more of a prom dress.
I asked the photographer if he could make sure she was in no photos because I didn’t want to see her wearing the same dress as me and to look like I copied her. She also copied my hairstyle from the wedding reception and it just made more mad but I didn’t let it ruin my day.
We’ve just received the photos and we’ve sent pictures of them to everyone and people started to pick up on the fact she wasn’t in them and my family except my cousin has told me I am an AH and a b*&h for not including my best friend since primary school in my wedding photos.
I didn't even include the ones from the rehearsal dinner because she was in white. AITA??
Let's see what readers thought.
paganchick70 writes:
Absolutely NTA. The MOH went out of her way to upstage the bride at every opportunity. She wore white multiple times in the lead-up to the wedding, even though she knew it wasn't appropriate. She wore the exact same style dress in white as the bride and even copied her hairstyle!
Even with all of that, the bride never made a scene. Refusing to pay for photos of the MOH deliberately trying to upstage her, was the nicest thing ANYONE could have done in that situation. I am very surprised no other members of the bridal party even attempted to spill on the MOH at any point during this.
atlanticwaters writes:
NTA, but just because I know, how much it means to some to stand out as the bride, or weddings in general.
Objectively, I think it's a pretty harsh measure to make sure that a certain person is guaranteed not to appear in the photos. I assume that as maid of honor, she also contributed something to the success of the day.
I find it emotionally understandable on the part of the bride, but ultimately rather pusillanimous and petty on the part of both maid (assuming she did it on purpose) and bride. "If they go low, we go high", is still the best advice in most life situations.