Bride fed up with wedding photo drama; publicly humiliates SIL in front of family. AITA?
When this bride makes a scene in front of her in-laws, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for “publicly humiliating” my SIL?"
I(30s F) got married to my husband (30s M) this July. Our wedding theme was “Faerie court”. We only invited close family and friends, and asked that they wear jewel toned dresses and suit jackets.
The wedding was in a sort of forest. We also took photos with almost everyone, not just the wedding party (which only consisted of a best man and a maid of honor).
My SIL (mid 20s), shows up in a blush pink dress, and her BF in a cream suit jacket. She thought that that would make her pop I guess (she is an attention seeker, by testimony of everyone but her mom).
Joke on her, my dress was gold and shimmery, and my husband was in an emerald green jacket. Also I was wearing a full on crown, no mistaking who the bride was.
When the photographer asked me if she should photoshop them a bit, to make them blend in more (since we went with a dramatic photo style, that emphasized the deep jewel tones, and the “darkness” of the forest), I told her not to bother, make them look nice, but don’t change the colors or anything like that.
Well, I received the photos 4 days ago. I posted some on my insta, and most on fb (since most of our older relatives use it exclusively), and they (SIL and BF) looked so out of place, they were almost washed out.
Then, she had the nerve to comment on my post, it was very passive aggressive, something along the lines of washing her out to make myself stand out more. I replied by saying that she washed herself out, by ignoring the wedding theme. She deleted her comment.
But then, we met last night, at my in-laws, it was an accident, not planned or anything. She said pretty much the same thing, I repeated that she was washed out because the photo style we chose emphasized deep colors, that’s why we asked people to wear jewel tones.
It escalated, and ended up with me telling her that she looked like crap in our photos (her complaint) because she was a jealous little woman who thought she could upstage me with a $30 dress the color of diluted pepto.
She started crying and left. Now my MIL says I owe SIL an apology for “publicly shaming her” and well as for insulting her looks. So AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
ladeytsurei writes:
ESH. All of you adults, I'll remind you. Why is everyone making a big deal of such petty details for something that was meant to be a big happy occasion ? Collectively move the fae on.
sloppypop writes:
NTA. A) You did not insult her looks, you told her that the colour of her dress was a bad choice and that you were aware she chose it to stand out from everyone else. B) You already told them the dress code and they chose to do their own thing.
Whilst I’m not necessarily for imposed dressed codes at weddings outside of the regular expectations (smart/smart casual/cocktail/black or white tie (and no white lol),) the fact that they look washed out in the photos is down to their choice of clothing, not the photographs or the photographer or you.
99min6 writes:
NTA OMG! I'm sorry but I laughed out loud. I guess I would apologize to her about saying what you said, and let her know that you didn't have any intention to make her look out of place in the photos. f you did want her washed out, I would apologize for that too and let her know you were hurt she didn't follow your wedding request.