Army husband says he removed his wedding ring because it was 'uncomfortable.' AITA?
"AITAH for taking my wedding ring off because it was uncomfortable?"
My wife and I recently moved to TN for my job. It is very far away from family and friends and our first time truly being on our own.
I am in the army and was stationed here with many of my friends, but my wife has yet to be able to get a job outside of babysitting because of personal stuff. That being said, my wife hasn’t gotten the chance to make many friends where I already have an established social circle.
A few friends of mine at work asked me to join them to hang out in Nashville for the night so I called my wife to let her know I was going. She immediately had an attitude about it because the day before I said I would be home that night, but I told her that sometimes plans change.
Then she got upset at me because it was the first weekend we would get to spend together since she wouldn’t be babysitting and instead of making plans with her, I chose my friends.
Before I could even respond to that she asked what I would even do since most places there only allow 21+. I told her there were a few bars that were any age and that we were just going to hang out.
When I came home to change she was already mad at me and blew off talking about it with a simple “don’t act single.” I told her that I was not the only married guy going and that my ring would stay on the entire night.
That’s where the issues came into play. I have to wear a rubber ring for work, and when I bought it, they didn’t have my size so it’s a bit too big. It slides around on my finger and gets really annoying.
So when we pulled up, I slid it into my pocket. I didn’t wanna have to deal with feeling it slide around, and god forbid it fall off and I lose it.
We also went in a large group and some people wound up splitting up. I stayed with the guys that were closer to my age, who also happened to be the single guys. But I cannot stress enough. I never planned to do anything that would cross her boundaries and I never did. I love her with my whole heart and cheating on her is the last thing I’d ever do to her.
I came home early with another friend because I knew she would be upset if I stayed out until 6am the next day with everyone else.
I was dumb enough to post pics on Instagram. I thought you couldn’t see my hands well enough to notice that my ring was off, but she saw it. I got a text about “how could I” and “she would have never done this to me” while I was at work, and I came home to her sobbing.
I told her that she was upset over nothing and that I simply took it off because it was sliding around. She didn’t believe me because “you’ve never once complained about it not fitting and I have never seen you take that ring off.” And I told her that it was because it only really started bothering me recently.
She told me she knew that I split with the single guys because my friend's wife told her. I explained that it was because they were closer to my age. She asked “how could you specify that it would stay on your finger and then take it off as soon as you leave” and “why would you say it would stay on and then not tolerate it for the one night.”
The Nashville trip happened 3 weeks ago. And she still asks about it sometimes.
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
YTA. I do not think the main issue is really with you taking off your ring (which is an issue). More you moving your partner across the country with no support system then ditching her for your pals when she knows literally no one but you.
And he says he “thought she wouldn’t be able to see his hand in the pic” meaning he knew she’d be bothered by it and he was trying to hide it. Even if he didn’t plan on cheating I’m sure deception is against his wife’s boundaries.
She’s gonna get real tired of sitting home alone all the time buddy..
The part that gets me is 'don't worry my ring will stay on all night' then as soon as they get to the door ring immediately comes off. Yeah I'm sure it was so 'annoying'.
Ha... yeah, man... YTA. Look at all the excuses and mental gymnastics you've built into this re-telling of it... and this is from your POV... imagine her side.
1. Get the proper sized ring... they're like $20, ya cheap shit.
2. Don't take photos were 'You thought you lack of a wedding ring wasn't visible.' Instead take photos where 'You are proud to be married.'
3. 'I love her with my whole heart and cheating on her is the last thing I’d ever do to her.' - When she spends every weekend working and you get 'the first weekend we would get to spend together'... fucking spend it WITH her.
You're making bad choices, my young married friend.