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Man snoops through GF's phone discovering she's going to leave him because of his ex.

Man snoops through GF's phone discovering she's going to leave him because of his ex.

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Dating is hard. Finding someone you're attracted to, connect with, and treat you well is easier said than done. The important part is to know your value and know that you deserve to be loved regardless of who you are.

On a popular Reddit thread in the Relationship Advice Subreddit, one man needs advice after he snoops through his girlfriend's phone and discovers that she will break up with him.

He writes:

I’ve been dating way out of my league for the past months. My girlfriend is gorgeous, popular, intelligent, well-educated, and comes from a wealthy family. I’m average-looking, a college dropout, and don’t make much money, and I’ve always wondered what she saw in me. I feel like people are always staring at us and thinking, how could someone like me be with a woman like her?

Our relationship has been great; we even talked about moving in together shortly. But she has been cold and distant for the past few days, ever since we ran into my ex on the street. My ex was nice but not as beautiful or stylish as my girlfriend.

We exchanged a few words and continued walking. My girlfriend asked me who that girl was, and I said, 'My ex.' She replied with 'Oh, okay' and started acting weird.

Today while she was showering, I saw a message from one of her friends on her phone. 'Please, don’t dump the dude; he adores you,' it said. I know her password and am embarrassed that I couldn’t resist snooping.

It was a long conversation, but my girlfriend said she felt second-hand embarrassment when she saw my ex and couldn’t be with someone who’s slept with 'something like that.'

She found my ex on Facebook and stalked her and couldn't believe I’d dated such a low-life person. She deserves a man with better taste and is out of my league.

I don’t know what to do, I thought I found my person, but she’s embarrassed by me. I don’t see how I’m in the wrong here or what I can do to keep this relationship going. I can’t turn back time.

The Internet is happy to provide advice:

MrBleah says:

Why would you want to stay with someone who thinks you're a low-life based on the appearance of someone you've dated? She sounds incredibly superficial. Just dump her and move on. There is no value in saving this relationship.

Spectrum2081 says:

You are not in the wrong for having an ex who is not up to your GF’s standards. You may be in the wrong for dating a girl who maintains standards for her SO’s exes. You love your GF, but she sounds extremely shallow and judgmental. Perhaps you should let the trash take itself out.

spiraldinosaur says:

Dump her instead? She sounds like a genuinely awful person. Who says sh*t like that? You're clearly on good enough terms with your ex that you can chat in the street; she's nice. And here's your girlfriend, jealous and nasty towards someone else, to pick herself up.

I'd rather be with a 'nice person' than someone whose selling points are her looks, money, and status and who goes stalking someone on Facebook just to say horrible things about her. Honestly, breaking up with her and telling her it's because she did something genuinely awful for no valid reason might help put her in her place.

Subspaceisgoodspace says:

You are not dating someone out of your league. You are dating. What you have found out though is that she is not who you thought she is. She turns out to be highly judgmental.

Personally I would break up with her because I wouldn’t want to be with someone who is so unkind and judgmental. Who cares what your ex looks like.

OP provided an update:

We had a long talk, like an hour long. She said she was generally angry because of how little I think of myself and that I’m great but refused to see it.

She said she’s tired of seeing me wasting my potential and refusing to change my low-paid job because I’m afraid of getting what I deserve. She thinks I underestimate myself and surround myself with average people because I think I’m like them.

She told me that she wants a person with more self-esteem who is afraid to take what’s rightfully theirs. She told me she needed time and that I use the time apart to work on myself and how I view the world. I won’t pressure her, and I’ll listen to her advice and use the time to reflect on myself and my life choices.

Ok, OP, didn't realize your girlfriend was part of the standards police.

Sources: Reddit
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