I (25M) love my girlfriend (24F). She is chill, funny, and kind. Recently we got into a bit of a heated discussion because of something I pointed out.
When I first met her, I realized she wasn’t very social. She likes alone time, to spend nights alone (I understand because she does work a lot) , and isn't very outgoing. She’s not anti social though, just a bit reserved.
But she doesn’t really have a big friend group. Myself on the other hand, I have about 25 friends. 10 very close friends. She only has two girl friends and the three of them only hang out like every other week.
Maybe it’s because I came from a small town where everybody knows each other, and come from a more populated area. I did think it was a red flag though at first. Since I’ve had the same friends since early childhood.
Anyways, for her birthday last week, I tried to put together a party and I asked who she wanted to invite, and she only said those two friends. For my party, I’m planning on having 25+ people.
I said, “that’s it?” And mentioned casually when we talked about growing up in my town that a girl who went to high school with us got made fun of for only having 1-2 friends.
She said to me “So it’s a problem I only have 2 friends? People haven’t counted friends since high school“
I wasn’t counting friends. I was just saying. Before I met her, I was hanging out with my friends very frequently. They go out for dinner or have sleepovers every other week. MAYBE once a week.
Anyways, AITA? I didn’t mean to make her feel bad. I just made an observation.
YTA. You're not making an observation. You're judging her.
YTA. When you’re “just making an observation” that draws a parallel between your gf and someone everyone thought was weird, you’re implying she’s weird. The entire tone of your post implies that she’s weird. Stop judging your gf’s social life.
Oh and by the way: once people start getting married and having kids, the chances of you keeping close with all of your current friends is almost zero. Eventually most of us end up with just a couple of good friends, if we’re lucky. So just enjoy yours while you have them and stop acting superior to your gf. She’s happy. That should be enough for you.
YTA. 'a girl who went to high school with us got made fun of for only having 1-2 friends'
The girl wasn't the problem here. Some people really are awful.
'I wasn’t counting friends.'
You were.
Hell, he counted them twice just in this post.
YTA - adult friendships are quality over quantity. She’s right, people SHOULD stop counting friends in high school.