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'My GF tried to incriminate me when police searched my house and I don't know why.' UPDATED

'My GF tried to incriminate me when police searched my house and I don't know why.' UPDATED


"My [29m] girlfriend [24f] tried to throw me under the bus when the police searched my house"

First I'd like to start with some background. My girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for a bit over a year. She stays at my house about 75% of the time. We have had no major problems before this point.

On Saturday night, we were watching TV in the living room, and suddenly there was loud pounding and shouting at the front door. My immediate reaction was to call the police, but after a look out the curtains, I found that it was the police.

At this point I was extremely confused. I don't sell, manufacture, or use drugs. I have no firearms in the house. I do nothing illegal online; I don't even pirate Game of Thrones. I had no idea why they might have reason to be knocking on my door on a Saturday night.

I opened the door and they immediately asked for permission to search the premises. I asked why they would think that was necessary, and they wouldn't answer. In turn, I refused to give them permission. My girlfriend repeatedly said I should cooperate. I said no, and told them to show me a warrant if they want to enter the house.

They then informed me that they had probable cause and were searching my place no matter what I thought about the situation, and that their asking was only a formality. The first thing they did after entering my house was pull my girlfriend and I into separate rooms and begin questioning us.

I kept demanding they show me a warrant, but apparently warrants aren't even a thing anymore because probable cause can be literally anything when your local PD is backwater and shitty enough.

I refused to answer any questions. I told them I wanted a lawyer if I was under arrest. I repeated that I did not consent to any searches of my property and repeatedly asked what their probable cause was--that there was nothing readily apparent (thank you Breaking Bad), and that they had no right to strip me of my privacy.

My girlfriend, on the other hand, talked a lot. I didn't hear much because she was in the next room but I overheard her say this: You should check the back yard shed! I've never been in there before and I can't say what's in it...

At the time I could only think "what the hell is she doing?" Well, the police checked the shed, and found nothing (again, I'm not a criminal), and an hour + hundreds of questions later left. At that point I asked why in the world she would try to help them find criminal activity in my house, and she could only answer that she panicked and didn't know what to do.

I don't need legal advice. My mother is a paralegal and knows a lot of good attorneys. She's furious about the police conduct, and she doesn't even know what my girlfriend said to them yet. I'm incredibly angry at my girlfriend for saying something so unbelievably moronic, but all she can respond to me with is "I panicked and didn't know what to do."

What I need more than anything is another perspective on why a person would throw their S/O under the bus like that. Does this seem like something that can be worked through, or is this just a huge red flag?

tl;dr cops searched my house without a warrant, and during the search, girlfriend seemingly tried to incriminate me with a random tip


KingTeaSea: Damn, this sounds super weird. It does however kinda depend on what they told her. If they'd said something like "we believe he has x in the house and if we find it without you telling us, you'll be in trouble too".

Now, I'd be disappointed if anyone I knew, loved and respected ratted me out to the cops, especially if I hadn't actually done ANYTHING wrong but it really does dpeend what they said. As per your description, they don't sound like the best police force in the world, they could've said literally anything to her.

Some people also turn to jelly when they see blue lights and a shiny badge. I have a friend who had a 20 bag hidden in his boxers and was stopped by the cops, asking for directions. Instead of just giving them the direction and moving on, he owned straight up to having the 20 bag. Don't automatically assume she knew she was ratting you out or even thought about what she was doing.

OP: This is what I honestly have in mind now. I can't buy that she was malicious. It really seems like she was just scared.

Giengi: Why the hell does everyone assume she called? You people are all gonna break your arms reaching that far. I really wish people would comment based on the actual story, rather than making up extra parts because it sounds more exciting in their heads. Maybe she did and maybe she didnt but there is not one damn thing in the original post to give any indication she called the police.

OP: Yeah I think if she wanted to frame me, there would be a thousand easier ways than calling the police and then sending them in a wild goose chase into a shed with rakes and shit

PlsbptntIhavAutism: Did you ever find out what they wanted? Or even if they had the right house?

OP: Not a clue. I'd ask a lot of questions, but I don't want the cops in my area to start harassing me.

He later shared this UPDATE:

Hey everyone. Due to legal reasons and other life obligations, I decided against updating my opening post until it was safe to do so. I got a lot of incredibly useful information and advice from it, and for that I am truly grateful. I will link that post below, but in lieu of the new rules, I have created a new account for this update. I will respond to this with my old one just to verify my identity.

[1] My girlfriend and I aged a year. I am now 30 and she is now 25. This was about as much as could be expected.

[2] The tip that the police received did not come from my girlfriend.

This was a giant clusterf@&$. About a year before I met my current girlfriend, I was sort of kind of seeing a 35-year-old woman. Our relationship was primarily physical in nature but she wanted me to drop everything and move in with her. Just about everyone I knew was telling me that there was something off about her, but I thought they were judging her for her age.

Then one night when we had a fight she chugged half a bottle of Cognac and I had to call an ambulance because she was completely unresponsive. I ghosted her after this and had to ignore her pounding on my door several times.

I went to the police station about a week after they raided me to file a formal complaint. I had consulted a lawyer and he advised me that it would be a good first step if I were going to take legal action. When I filed the complaint, I tried to get information on who falsely accused me of a crime that warranted a raid without a warrant, but they wouldn't budge. My lawyer told me as much.

Six months after the raid, I heard through the grapevine that my ex-FWB/GF called the police to inform them that I was cooking crystal meth in my basement. I only learned about this because a mutual friend who my ex had recently confided in spilled the beans.

I figured out soon thereafter that she had seen me with my current girlfriend somewhere, and decided I must have been cheating on her when we were still together (a year earlier). She exacted her revenge by getting me swatted.

I went to the police station to file a report against her, but the person at the front desk essentially laughed me out of the building. When I consulted my lawyer, he told me that it was pointless to even bother. Maybe with a better PD and in a better city.

[3] I was advised against trying to sue the PD

More specifically, my lawyer told me that I could sue if I wanted, but that if he were me he wouldn't. When I asked why he said that usually if you can prove the unwarranted search were racially motivated/based on prejudice or corruption, you could (possibly) win. But the police screwing the pooch was generally a weak reason. Again, maybe against a better PD in a less backwards region.

[4] My girlfriend talked because of previous bad experiences

I forgave my girlfriend for overtalking to the police. Many people in the original post were entirely pitchforks up/even suggesting that she called the police, and I understand why.

Some people went kind of over the line and suggested that she may have planted evidence. But some were explaining that there are people who simply freeze up with the police. Knowing her, I thought this must be the case.

Months after the incident, my girlfriend sat me down and let out that a police officer had molested her when she was in her teens during a routine traffic stop. He decided she needed to be "searched," and used it as an excuse to feel her up. I was horrified. Before you ask, yes, I received her permission to post this detail honestly--and when you read this post, I love you so much.

[5] We moved

We moved out of nowhereville. We live in a larger city now, and coincidentally my parents also had reason to move here too.

Her parents are originally from elsewhere in the country, but we are closer to them now too. One last little happy note is that we are getting married next year, and we are both incredibly excited about starting our lives together.

TL;DR: my girlfriend didn't actually throw me under the bus, my crazy ex tried to hand me a stick of dynamite, I got swatted by the police, and all I got was this lousy reddit post


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