'My wife thinks I got laid off but really I quit to make a go at being a Twitch streamer full time.'
"My wife thinks I got laid off but really I quit to make a go at being a Twitch streamer full time."
My wife doesn't follow or know anything about Twitch or video games at all. She doesn't have any knowledge of or connection to the industry I used to work in. She is a paramedic so she works different shifts and does not know I stream at times when she is not home.
Her salary is enough to cover our bills although things will be a bit tighter until I starting making money on my stream. I'm not going to tell anyone until I'm bringing in enough money that I can do it full time.
I have never been happier and not stressed as I am now. It's easy for me to lock myself in my home office and say I'm networking and job hunting when I'm really streaming if my wife and/or my 3 year old is home.
If she's not working or my daughter is not at daycare it's harder but I make it work. I feel a bit guilty for lying but I have wanted to do this for a long time. No one that I know in real life knows.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
So you’re never going to tell anyone…You’re not going to make money, you’re a freaking loser taking advantage of your wife. Grow up and get a job and Help take care of YOUR child, Or you can wait til your wife finds out what a deceitful user you are and hopefully leaves you.
Damn bro lying to your wife is a horrific thing to do. What if you don't make it and never make money like 90% of the people who try? What are you going to tell her you have been doing for months/years?
If he does end up making it, imagine him telling his wife. "Hey honey I've been lying to you for months/years but it all worked out. Even though you were the only one supporting us for months and we had to go without often."
You are being a really, really bad husband. If I was your wife, I would not care if you started making money doing this, because I would be HEART BROKEN that you lied and deceived me. And not over something small, over quitting your job!
The entire financial burden is now on her, and she doesn’t even know!! What if she decided to quit or gets fired… you guys would be up sh*ts creek without a paddle. Not being dramatic, but I would leave you over this. This is insanity.
Yikes. You’re lying to your wife and putting both of your financial futures at risk. Chances are, you will never make a significant amount of money from twitch. You just won’t. For the vast majority of people, any kind of content creation is a hobby. Not a career.
Well, over THREE YEARS later, the OP returned with an update.
I know I'll probably get flamed but I get it. I understand that I am the one who ruined my life and my marriage. My divorce was finalized a year ago. She found out about 6 months after I posted.
I understand that I was wrong and that I screwed up. I regret my stupidity so much. She left our flat with our daughter and went to live with her sister and hired a solicitor and that was it. Don't be stupid like me.
We have been divorced for a year and I recently found out she just started dating again. I'm gutted. I miss her. I miss my daughter because she only lives with me half of the time.
Whenever I see my wife's sister or other members of her family, they give me the stink eye. I can't believe I was such a lazy moron while she was out there busting her butt as a paramedic.
I understand why everyone hates me and sided with her. I know I'll get judged either way but I'm posting in case anyone understands what I'm going through and has experienced being gutted when your ex starts dating again.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
I read your original post and the funny thing is that everyone told you this was going to happen, and it did.
If you haven't already, it's likely past time to speak to a therapist about how you sabotaged your job and marriage to find out what happened and how to avoid doing something like this, again.
You already know you're the bad guy now, but I just can't comprehend what you thought was going to happen. I've lived the majority of my life in near-poverty and I have back-up plans for my back-up plans, so I am a somewhat financially paranoid person.
How do you turn that off just to risk your entire life away? I don't understand and I'm sorry that the conditions you grew up in probably led you to making these poor choices. Some people are just not built for success.
You're "gutted" that she's dating again? You. Betrayed. Her. You have no right to feel hurt because she's moving on and finding someone who doesn't abdicate their adult responsibilities to play games.
What you're "going through"? You're "going through" the natural and just consequences of your choices. Do you really miss her, or do you miss having a cosy, comfortable life to gamble with? Someone to take on the financial and mental load, to take care of your daughter, so you can play games.
You miss your daughter? You lived in the same damn house and chose to game instead of stepping up as a parent. Parenthood means providing for your child and being there for them, not locking yourself away to follow your bliss while not contributing to keeping a damn roof over their head and food on the table.
Such entitlement. What would happen if your wife had pulled the same stunt - expected you to pay the bills from the day job while she pissed around? What if both of you had decided to quit your jobs in secret? You assumed she would carry you. You weren't willing to carry yourself, never mind anyone else.
You lied to her. You were happy to place all the financial burden on her shoulders while she's out there saving lives. You were happy to abdicate your parental responsibilities in return for meaningless internet updoots.
The time to quit your job is when your side hustle brings in enough money to quit the day job. NOT BEFORE. Be real, you wanted to cosplay your fantasy of being a Twitch streamer.