"AITA for being upset with my wife for an obvious lie?"
Dobri_Dobrev
My wife had her company Christmas party last night. They always hold the Christmas party in late January. She works at a hotel. The party was supposed to run from 5pm-8pm.
I fell asleep around 7pm, and when I woke up after 10pm she wasn't home. I called her several times until 11pm. This is where it gets weird. Every time I called her, someone answered the phone but they said nothing.
I just heard some hushed noise in the background. This must have happened at least half a dozen times. I would stay on the phone for a minute asking her why she wasn't talking and telling her that this is weird before hanging up.
Eventually the phone started to go to voicemail. Sometime after 11pm I called her hotel and asked to speak to her. I was told she was still in the meeting room at the event and they could give her a message but they couldn't get her for me.
By now I'm irritated and I hung up. Finally at nearly 1am I get a call from her. She said she got way too drunk and she ended up in one of the hotel rooms to sleep it off but she doesn't remember how.
She said her coworkers put her in a room. She said this was shortly after 8pm and that she was alone in the room. I asked her where her phone was during this time. She said it was in the room with her. I asked her how any of this could be the case considering from 10 to 11 I was calling and someone was answering but saying nothing. She said she doesn't know.
She also said when she came down to the lobby her coworker who I had spoken to on the phone told her that I called. I asked why he lied to me. She said he didn't lie and that he didn't know the party was over or that she was passed out in a room.
She went on to say that she couldn't find her keys and that her coworker (the same one I had spoken to and the one she said didn't know the party was over or that she was passed out in a room) told her that another coworker took them from her so she couldn't drive home.
Excuse me? So this coworker didn't know the party was over, and he didn't know you were passed out in a room, but he knew another coworker had your keys? What??? At this point she realizes how ignorant that sounds and starts getting her story all mixed up and she kept repeating that she doesn't know anything.
I am angry, and I know something strange happened. I am angry that my wife wasn't home until 1am and communicated nothing with me. I am angry that her coworker lied to me. And I am angry that she clearly isn't telling me the truth. She says I'm the only person who would be upset by any of this and that I'm being too paranoid.
Here are the top rated comments from readers:
Trailsya
NTA. This all seems very strange. It is possible that the coworker was just covering for her because the coworker thought you wouldn't like her being drunk. Still, the picking up of the phone multiple times is strange.
DamnitGravity
If she was genuinely drunk, she may have heard the phone ringing, and thought she was pressing the 'reject call' button but actually hit the 'accept call' button.
Particular-Try5584
Oh something has happened. But before you jump to raging assumptions maybe gently ask your wife if she thinks her drink was spiked and take her for a drug and rape screen. If she really can’t recall what happened then that’s a good idea.
If she refuses to do that it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen and she’s lying, a lot of women reject what has happened in their minds memory because who wants to accept that particular brand of shit. But if she has a rape kit done there’s a chance of finding out what happened.
If she refuses outright, then that’s her right. But… I’d be curious what was then coming through on the work whatsapp the post party chats and so on …
Glassgrl1021
I mean, something is definitely shady about this situation, but I’m not sure if your wife is shady or if something happened to her like she was drunk and someone took advantage of her or she was possibly drugged. Maybe the friend you spoke with thought she was covering for her or maybe she didn’t know about the keys until after she spoke with you.
It seems odd that if she were doing something she shouldn’t that she or the person she was with would keep answering your calls but not speaking. If your wife was lying to you, simply saying she couldn’t find her phone or that it died is much more plausible than my phone was with me and I don’t know.
Unfortunately I don’t really have any advice on how to get to the bottom of this unless you can get more out of your wife or you can reach out to someone else at her work that might know more.
uneofone
Sketchy AF. Something happened there, the question is what. If possible, tell her she needs to get a drug test and SAE kit because between her version and yours, someone was with her while she was incapacitated and wanted you to know.
Ask to go through her phone, IF she’s involved there may be communication, if something was done TO her, she wouldn’t be included in messages. I hope this is just a weird situation and nothing serious happened, but the situation is very concerning. ETA: NTA.