Wife tells husband that it's time to give up on his dreams. AITA?
When this wife is frustrated with her husband, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for getting ready to tell my husband to give up on his dream?"
My husband and I both work in fields we didn't really picture ourselves in but we realized it is what is it and we need to pay bills etc. His job was in sales and it got toxic quick.
They didn't like him and I told him to start looking for a new job because they kept threatening him and I've seen it happen before. He didn't listen and ended up getting put on a PIP plan because he took his first vacation and they didn't like that. I told him to apply for new jobs and he didn't. Lost his job.
He always loved videography/vido editing so while applying for jobs he wants to also try and do that and try to do that fulltime. It's been months and we haven't gotten ANY unemployment and the few clients he has doesn't even make a dent in helping financially its basically nonexistent at this point.
I do not want to tell my husband he can't have his dream job but I told him he needs to find a part time job at least in the meantime so we can get some guaranteed income because its reallt stressing me out and im tired of having zero dollars in my bank account. Our debt is rising from credit cards and we can't pay them off.
I don't eat as well as I used to with groceries and that's frustrsting too to eat twice a day sometimes once.
I keep telling him to put his work on tiktok because it's amazing and all it takes it one video and he cam be his own boss. He hasn't done anything for his own channel in months. He still hasn't even gotten a part time job and I'm at my wits end.
The holidays are coming up and I can't even afford to give our family any gifts let alone ourselves. I am working my butt off at a job i dont even love to try and get a promotion and raise. I'm even considering getting a part time job because I can't keep doing this anymore.
I keep telling him when you want something you do it but I am just not seeing the same level of want i expected. He says if he goes back to sales then he can't edit because he won't have time.
I understand its time consuming but i just feel like at this point he always has an excuse to not do something. Can't work uber because it doesn't pay enough, don't wanna go part time retail because I might as well go back to fulltime, can't do fulltime because then I can't do what I love.
Like what??? If we got unemployment i would feel better but we haven't gotten any. At what point do I say enough is enough? Like why is it so hard to get a part time job if you really want this dream of yours?
Why doesn't he care? I understand business' don't happen overnight but a PART TIME JOB WON'T STOP YOU. I am tired so tired. I feel like a parent/manager not a wife. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
elizabethdarcy writes:
NTA. He needs to get a full time job doing SOMETHING unless he is disabled and unable to work. Plenty of people pursue their dream "side gig" that doesn't pay well on nights/weekends while working full time until if/when that side gig goes viral and starts bringing in enough income to pay the bills.
But that's a big if. Some people get lucky and go viral and are able to support themselves doing what they love. For some people, that never happens and they will always have to work their day job and just do their dream thing on the side for fun. Your husband may be one of those people.
But not working while you are going hungry isn't an option. He needs to get off his butt.
leadsearcher writes:
NTA - It's incredibly hard to make a living doing videography and video editing. He should get a real job to pay the bills, and can do videography as a hobby and put his videos online etc. If eventually that turns into something else, great, but paying the bills is the most important thing right now.
lilymay writes:
NTA. Now. The time is now. He needs to have income. His dreams come second to meeting the needs of food and shelter. He is sacrificing you to his dream that he’s not putting the effort into making coming true.
People don’t fulfill their dreams because it’s 80 hour weeks for years on end. If he can’t realize that there is a price to pay for following a dream, then he will never succeed.