Woman asks if she was wrong to tell fiancé's rich family he lost his job; he's furious.
If you've ever dated someone who comes from a much different socio-economic background, things can sometimes get uncomfortable, especially with the older generations, who may not be as down to earth as the person you're dating.
In this Reddit post in the 'Am I The A**hole' subreddit, a woman is constantly being put down by her fiancé's mother, and he's doing nothing to fix things. In a moment of rage, she exposes him, leading to serious conflict. Here's her story...
So, My fiance (m33) comes from a well off family. I (f29) come from a working class family. My fiance's family are nice but they can't help throwing comments at me about how I 'might be' a 'Gold Digger'.
For example, if he buys me something they'll go 'oh Jason bought you that? You know what this looks like right?' And/or 'Wait, Jason paid for this? Only gold diggers make their partners pay for stuff all the time, just sayin'.... It's so demeaning and my fiance does nothing to stop it. Especially now that he's in a bad place in life after he lost his job.
And since he's keeping it secret then, I'm the one paying for everything. This has been going on for 4 months.
Last week, His parents invited us for dinner and he insisted that we go so we went. At the dinner table his mom grabbed my hand (literally while I was eating!!), and looked at my bracelet and went 'Oh, this bracelet looks really nice, did Jason pay for it?'
I nodded and reminded her that he bought it for me as a birthday gift last year. She was like 'hmmmm, wonder how much it costs.....' she then leaned back and said 'You know I remember when my brother was dating this gold digger woman...she'd recieve expensive stuff like this (pointing at the bracelet) bracelet here for her birthdays....'
I was stunned, I cut her off and asked if she meant to say that I was a Gold Digger. She threw her hands up and went 'I mean...if the shoe fits....' while laughing awkwardly. Silence took over. I looked at my fiance and he shook his head at me like 'what?!?!?!' I snapped!!
I told her it was bold of her to imply I was a Gold Digger when I'm literally providing for her unemployed son, have been for 4 months now. They all looked shocked. She glanced at me in shock and his dad asked if it was true and my fiance just froze but looked so angry. An argument ensued and dinner was cut short and we had to leave after they started berating him.
He had a rage fit in the car just yelling and lashing at me. In my defense, I said that he sat by and let his mom continuelly imply that I was a Gold Digger but he said that they never outright called me a Gold Digger so it was all in my head.
He said I still had no right to take advantage of his 'unfortunate circumstance' to get back at his mom and expose him to the family. His parents went on about how disappointed they were and now as a result, he got disinvited from Thanksgiving.
He blew up at me because of it this morning and kept saying I screwed him over so badly when he was just an innocent bystander.
Here's what people had to say in the comments:
SadderOlderWiser writes:
NTA - I think you should uninvite your fiancé from your wedding.
mortgage_gurl writes:
Plus who wants to marry into a family that disinvites their own son from a holiday dinner for being unemployed? Yuck. I’m not saying OP is an AH just agreeing this is one horrible family.
Dragonlover18 writes:
My guess? He's the gold digger and knew his parents wouldn't approve and would cut him off from his future inheritance.
Pondnymph writes:
Listen to us, this is not good or normal and not worth anything you think this relationship could be. Source: married for 8 years and we have not raised voices against each other once in this time.
Editor's note: They haven't raised their voices once in 8 years? Pshycos.
gurbi_et_orbi writes:
Her marriage will be miserable and probably a pre-nup will have to be signed anyway. So really, not one single upside to this story
Roclawzi writes:
He has a spine, but only to stand up to her. Honestly sounds like he sees her as less than himself, and sees himself as less than his family. So he'll let her pay all the bills while his wealthy family calls her a gold digger, but won't tell his family he might need financial and/or career help.